Hello again
So it was an uneventful day today. Rain and sun. Depending where I was. Trying to do this left handed thing. Very uncomfortable.
Mom was very tried today, when I arrived. Almost asleep in her chair. I could see it in her eye's, bored, lonely. No one speaking with her or even interacting with her. I imagine this is what most of her days are like.
Since she doesn't speak, I guess they see it fit to leave her alone, by herself. I would be very bored as well. This made me, today, very emotional. I care for what happens to my mom. I care that she is bored, that she is alone like this. I care deeply about her happiness.
This is not happy. It seems she is only happy and secure when I am their. This is why she hold my hand all the time and doesn't want to let go. This is why she is so comfortable when I am with her, that she can close her eye's right away, when she grabs my hand.
As I have always said, lonely seniors die sooner. Let us do something about it. This is exactly what I am doing.
No one, as in most people in this world, wants to be like this and be alone, with no one to be their for them. I am sure I am not just speaking for myself. I am speaking for all who read this. Would you want to be in my mother's shoes. Even for one day. I think not!
It is very hard on me. It makes me cry and just give mom big hugs. It makes me cry myself to sleep at nights. Worrying about her well being. Not just her health, but her over all well being.
Is she getting enough attention, are they making sure mom is active, are they doing everything they can to make sure mom has somewhat of a social life. Or are they just leaving her alone. As I feel that is what is happening. Actually, I know that is what happens.
It bothers me, to no end, that I am stuck in Coquitlam, and not living in White Rock, as I should be doing. And not getting any assistance with anything.
Is it to much to ask for, a little help. And now having to deal with the injuries of this accident and the food poisoning. I have not eaten a meal since last Thursday. My stomach is still bothering me. Crackers again.
Now mom ate as much as she wanted to, this evening. I always tell her to eat what you want, if you don't like it, don't eat it. It won't hurt my feelings if what I bring is not something you like. Eat as much or as little as you want. I give mom time to eat. It takes her over an hour to eat dinner. And that is OK. Take your time, there is no rush.
So mom ate as much as she wanted too. While I did the dishes, mom was falling asleep in her chair. And when we got back to her room, I needed to change the sheets. To put on her own sheets.
This is very difficult, using only one arm. Especially one's none dominate arm. But I did it. Mom was asleep, while doing this. And mostly asleep while changing her into her night gown.
I rang the bell for the staff member to come and put her to bed. She left mom uncovered, and cold. I covered mom up, brushed her teeth and gave her the nightly spa treatment. The nurse had to wake her up to give mom her nightly medicine. When the nurse finished, I needed to give mom a drink, to wash that taste away. And back to sleep mom went.
I made sure I stayed until mom was snoring. OK, I am sure she doesn't want anyone knowing she snores.
I sang our nightly good night song to her. As I have been doing for 2 1/2 years, since she has been here. And when I could before.
I can type very well, but with these injuries, I am having to resort to one handed typing. The left hand. And it is taking a very long time to do this.
I started this blog tonight, thinking I would only be writing a little bit. I guess I was wrong.
Need to go. Have to write in my pain journal.
Please pray for mom that I find a place very soon. I really do hate being here now.
GOD bless and good night
Kris Schmuland
