Hello Again
I want to start by saying that this blog is a story of everything that happens in my mother's and my journey through Dementia and Alzheimer's. The pain,the thoughts, the feelings and the emotions of my mother and myself. I will not lie and will not censored for anyone. This is the truth and nothing about the truth is every gentle. Sometimes it can be very painful. To watch your only family member go through this.
All I want to do is move to White Rock and be able to be at the hospital in a moments notice. And about Zulfiya. I don't want her to come over here. I have to find a place, get the funds, and move. Then get everything for the place and start to concentrate on adsaac. Spend time developing my website.
Mom tonight was in a good mood. She ate a bunch of fruit and the rest of the yogurt. And right away after dinner, she need the washroom and then wanted her nightly beauty treatment. While listening to the music. And as usual, a few of the other residents came up around her room and just sat their and listened to the music and relaxed. Music therapy is what I am about. This is why mom is doing so well. Being mellow.
I am about treatment, not control. As psychiatrists are. Making my mother well, not keeping her down.Getting her walking and talking. I am not Ok and it is a very stressful time right now for me. I got soaking wet today and my shoes have holes in them. Garbage shoes to begin with. Only had them since April. My windbreaker does not keep the rain out.
As I said I do not hold back. I say everything I am thinking and feeling at the time I am writing this. The PGT makes promises and then changes their mind. This is something I have had to deal with for the entire time Mom and dad have been forced to have their finances looked after. This is due to my uncle and then the PGT not telling me that they went to court and took over mom and dads money. And then the PGT have taken thousands and thousands of dollars from their, now moms account and will not account for it. They will not even give access to the books to me, to see where they have spend the money. I do know how they charge for their services. And Stephen Flynn has told me about the waste of money on a companion service.
Now I will have to go. Tonight I am extremely tired.
GOD Bless and good night.
Kris.
Saturday, October 22, 2011
Friday, October 21, 2011
Streeeeeeeeesed II
Hello again My number is 604.552.0557
First I would like to state the order of finances in our life. There is the poor. I fall way below that line.
Now, I want to move to White Rock and have my friend come over to visit. I have never made a decision like this before. It feels good but I just don't know how it will happen. I am praying that I receive an answer soon, As I need go get furniture and everything. And I also have to write Zulfiya. I don't want to write her and tell her not to come. She is so looking forward to this. I am as well. She is doing everything she can to be able to come here. I can't write her and tell her no. You can't come.
I know I will be devastated, and she will be in a worse case as she is getting things in order to get a visa. And this is a difficult thing for her to do in her country.
I am extremely pissed off at the PGT for telling me they will help with things and then turn around and say no. They are one of the cities biggest abusers of clients and the family members who are trying to help their again parent.
The Province just wrote a 4 or 5 page spread on Seniors abuse. Well I am going to calling the Province tomorrow and telling them my story, I have years of dirt on the PGT and River View hospital. And I am going to tell it come hell or high water.
Stephen Flynn is turning out to be a huge, well I am to polite to say what I want to say about him. He is just putting me off day after day. And giving a bunch of garbage answers. Repeating his self on conversations which we already had. This is to stall me even more. I have no rain jacket or any jacket to keep me warm and this *^%)( has no compassion or understanding that I am the one who travels to White Rock and back daily. No one else. does this for their parents and I get shit for doing this. I lost friends because of doing this. Every one praises me for doing this, but nobody helps.
Well PGT get ready for a fight like you have never seen before. I want to move to White Rock to be close to mom so I can deal with the doctors and get mom on a proper treatment plan. No to be drugged out as Riverview did. To get her walking again. To get her dental work done.
But no. You want to play games with me, screw you. I am done playing with you, You steal from your clients. I am going to let the world know this. What ever it takes. And first I will phone the Province paper. Then every newspaper and TV studio in Vancouver. I am reporting them to the citizens commission of human rights. I will tell everyone. I have picket sign's made and flyer's as well.
They are either going to pay me or pay with negative publicity from the media.
My mother is of course always glad to see me. I am running out of everything again. And I am broke and trying to get things done. Mom wants to walk, but of course I am banned from doing this. But the hospital is not doing it either. Whats new. It is exactly as I said they would do. They don't mom to walk. This means more trouble for them. And the occupational therapist was to get back to me this week, but do you think this has happened. Not a chance. Of course, this is the way it happens
You have to understand I will not stop writing, as it is the truth and I will not be stopped for anything. And if they want to try to sue me, be my guest. It is not like anyone has not tried to do this already. With no luck, thus far. I love my mother and I am going to do everything I can do to make things right for her. If everyone grows to hate me, oh well, it is not like people don't already dislike me. Why do you think I don't have friends. I can tell a lie a mile away and people don't like to know that you know the truth. It is a gift, but a lonely gift. This I have grown to accept over the years. Right from a child I have had this gift.
I am so, so , so stressed and I don't want to feel like this anymore. Everything is out of control and my control. Which the latter of the two is a good. I am loosing it, physically, mentally and spiritually. I feel very weak and lately there is no sleep for me. But I can not stop, no matter what happens I have to continue.
I just wish I got the miracle I have asked for. I just want to move to White Rock and have my friend come over. And to furnish my place. I don't need a 2000 couch. Just something new. New furniture. GOD forbid I would like this. Since in the last several years I have had it all stolen, wrecked by water or fire. And none of it was my fault.
I just finished my education and I should be happy, It has not even sunk in yet that I am a professional and am equal to these doctors. This education alone was a long and winding road. I have gone through the worst part of my life I think. And things can get worse, but who cares. I don't. I am only interested in my mother's health and happiness. And yes I am in pain everyday and it is getting worse, because of the long bus trip. Yet I will not show this to anyone. Especially my mother. I will and do always have a smile on my face when I see her. And that is because I love my mother and she is happy to see me.
Again I could go on and on. I think I could write 10,000.00 words and more. But I do have to say good night. I have to make an early call to the Province news paper tomorrow, and depending on the outcome of that conversation. Phone the PGT and speak with the manager, and let her know what is going to happen.
So GOD Bless and good night
Kris
First I would like to state the order of finances in our life. There is the poor. I fall way below that line.
Now, I want to move to White Rock and have my friend come over to visit. I have never made a decision like this before. It feels good but I just don't know how it will happen. I am praying that I receive an answer soon, As I need go get furniture and everything. And I also have to write Zulfiya. I don't want to write her and tell her not to come. She is so looking forward to this. I am as well. She is doing everything she can to be able to come here. I can't write her and tell her no. You can't come.
I know I will be devastated, and she will be in a worse case as she is getting things in order to get a visa. And this is a difficult thing for her to do in her country.
I am extremely pissed off at the PGT for telling me they will help with things and then turn around and say no. They are one of the cities biggest abusers of clients and the family members who are trying to help their again parent.
The Province just wrote a 4 or 5 page spread on Seniors abuse. Well I am going to calling the Province tomorrow and telling them my story, I have years of dirt on the PGT and River View hospital. And I am going to tell it come hell or high water.
Stephen Flynn is turning out to be a huge, well I am to polite to say what I want to say about him. He is just putting me off day after day. And giving a bunch of garbage answers. Repeating his self on conversations which we already had. This is to stall me even more. I have no rain jacket or any jacket to keep me warm and this *^%)( has no compassion or understanding that I am the one who travels to White Rock and back daily. No one else. does this for their parents and I get shit for doing this. I lost friends because of doing this. Every one praises me for doing this, but nobody helps.
Well PGT get ready for a fight like you have never seen before. I want to move to White Rock to be close to mom so I can deal with the doctors and get mom on a proper treatment plan. No to be drugged out as Riverview did. To get her walking again. To get her dental work done.
But no. You want to play games with me, screw you. I am done playing with you, You steal from your clients. I am going to let the world know this. What ever it takes. And first I will phone the Province paper. Then every newspaper and TV studio in Vancouver. I am reporting them to the citizens commission of human rights. I will tell everyone. I have picket sign's made and flyer's as well.
They are either going to pay me or pay with negative publicity from the media.
My mother is of course always glad to see me. I am running out of everything again. And I am broke and trying to get things done. Mom wants to walk, but of course I am banned from doing this. But the hospital is not doing it either. Whats new. It is exactly as I said they would do. They don't mom to walk. This means more trouble for them. And the occupational therapist was to get back to me this week, but do you think this has happened. Not a chance. Of course, this is the way it happens
You have to understand I will not stop writing, as it is the truth and I will not be stopped for anything. And if they want to try to sue me, be my guest. It is not like anyone has not tried to do this already. With no luck, thus far. I love my mother and I am going to do everything I can do to make things right for her. If everyone grows to hate me, oh well, it is not like people don't already dislike me. Why do you think I don't have friends. I can tell a lie a mile away and people don't like to know that you know the truth. It is a gift, but a lonely gift. This I have grown to accept over the years. Right from a child I have had this gift.
I am so, so , so stressed and I don't want to feel like this anymore. Everything is out of control and my control. Which the latter of the two is a good. I am loosing it, physically, mentally and spiritually. I feel very weak and lately there is no sleep for me. But I can not stop, no matter what happens I have to continue.
I just wish I got the miracle I have asked for. I just want to move to White Rock and have my friend come over. And to furnish my place. I don't need a 2000 couch. Just something new. New furniture. GOD forbid I would like this. Since in the last several years I have had it all stolen, wrecked by water or fire. And none of it was my fault.
I just finished my education and I should be happy, It has not even sunk in yet that I am a professional and am equal to these doctors. This education alone was a long and winding road. I have gone through the worst part of my life I think. And things can get worse, but who cares. I don't. I am only interested in my mother's health and happiness. And yes I am in pain everyday and it is getting worse, because of the long bus trip. Yet I will not show this to anyone. Especially my mother. I will and do always have a smile on my face when I see her. And that is because I love my mother and she is happy to see me.
Again I could go on and on. I think I could write 10,000.00 words and more. But I do have to say good night. I have to make an early call to the Province news paper tomorrow, and depending on the outcome of that conversation. Phone the PGT and speak with the manager, and let her know what is going to happen.
So GOD Bless and good night
Kris
Thursday, October 20, 2011
streeeeeeesed
Hello again
I am so stressed out right now and have been for a few days, I am vibrating, shaking like crazy. If this stress is not solved soon, I feel I will have a heart attack. I am not sleeping, maybe 3 hours at the most every night. On top of this my hip and leg is getting very sore, traveling back and forth. I have never had to travel this far before. Sitting on the bus for those many hours is bothering my hip and leg. It goes numb and then hurts an amazing amount and then my leg starts to shake. I need to stand but can't I get very anxious and want off the bus. But I can't. This causing me even more stress.
One thing I do know is this. I have spent many weeks thinking about what to do. Move to White Rock or not. I have always come back to Coquitlam. Where ever I was, and whatever country I lived in. It was my home. But it has not felt like home in a long time. It is just convenient. Everything is right within a block. There is no feeling either way about being a home, where I live. And I finally decide it is time to leave this behind. I made the decision to move to White Rock and this was not taken lightly.
I have never done this before. I always just moved, well just went. As I am moving to the east coast of the US, or I am going to Alberta. I just picked up and went. Never a thought about it. Now I had to really think about this. As I am leaving what use to be home, behind and starting over in a new city. Yes it is only White Rock. But I know no one their. Well I don't have any friends here anyways.
I have nothing and need everything. I am tired of having everything taken from me, as everything I had. And I have nothing now, because of it.
I even have a women wanting to come over to Canada,who wants to see me and spend time with me. I have been writing and talking with her for a while now. And this is causing me great anxiety. I can't have her come here. It is crap. It is a dead space and it is very depressing for me. Yes I have chosen to live poorly. But come on. I don't have to live with constant crap as I have lived with for many years now. I really have no real space or time to be me. Or even have people over to try to make friends with someone. I live in my room. And that is that. I have to deal with roommates who are just pigs and don't know how to clean. I do all the cleaning and it is a very stressful thing for me. Especially now, when everything is coming at me now.
I really need to move to White Rock to deal with the doctors and to be in a place where I can actually run my business properly. With a built in clientele. White Rock is know for its seniors population. And this is who my clients are.
I can not do any of this here in Coquitlam while having to travel everyday as I do. This is actually killing me physically and mentally and spiritually.
Not only is this getting to me, but being banned from walking mom and then the hospital does not even do it. As I thought would happen. Mom wants to walk and she needs the exercise. I know what my mother needs and she is not getting it.
This is why I need to move to White Rock. I need to get mom to places and see different doctors. This I cannot do from Coquitlam.
I am dying here. I need everything, I have a women coming from Europe to see me. And I want to see her. I am not feeling comfortable about this. I am having a very hard time deciding what to do about this.
Zulfiya has allot of hoops to run through just to get a visa to come here. It was her idea to do this. It is her vacation and she has never been to Canada. I would love to spend time showing her my city. The real city. Cooking with her. Talking face to face. Not over the Internet or via email. To walk with her, be with her. Not that way. I never even thought I would ever meet someone and that I would be single for the rest of my life, To die alone. But this is very strange to me.
I am stopping myself from even having feelings for her. I know I do and this is very strange to me. I have never felt anything about anyone in a very long time. I mean over 10 years. I don't know what to do.
This thing called money is the only thing stopping me from a complete change of life, to start fresh and anew. To begin again, with the thought I am doing the right thing and maybe fall in love again.
I pray with out ceasing all the time I am traveling. I PRAY TO GOD ALL DAY FOR A MIRACLE, AND SOON, as in right away. I am to stressed out.
I am in need of love in my life. I love my mother to death. But I need to have someone I can talk to when I need a hug or to just hold someones hand and walk through the park. Just enjoying each other's company. To discuss my ideas with, and for me to support them in what ever they do.
I think Zulfiya is making a mistake. I don't deserve to be loved. I am not a worthy person. I would like it as it may remove the despair in my heart. The loneliness that has dwelt in my soul for what has seemed like eternity. The feeling of emptiness, dreading the day, even upon awakening. There is a time when a soul can no longer take the desperation of being. The knowing that there is nothing that awaits him. the lack of even knowing that tomorrow will bring another day of isolation from the world. His speech diminishing with each passing hour. Not wanting to even say a word. Just nod.
I don't write Zulfiya, as I am waiting for a miracle when everything will come together in perfect harmony. I feel like I am in a dream and I am going to wake up one day and find out that it has all been a nightmare. And I am Ok.
I can't wait much longer, as Zulfiya is doing everything she can do to get over here and be with me. I know I have to write the letter telling her that I am nothing but a looser and not to come.
I can not keep this traveling up. I might not be able to walk one day. It is that bad. I think that tomorrow a knock will come to my door and their will be my angel with the funds I need to move and get everything I need for a household and money to keep myself going until my business takes off. And money to show Zulfiya around and make sure that her first trip to Canada is a fantastic one.
Only a dream, I say, only a dream. I will awake tomorrow morning and I will be just me, in the same place and when I go to look at another place. Just a hope that it will all work out. And maybe this will be the rebirth of a desperate soul. My life.
GOD Bless and good night
With love
Kris
I am so stressed out right now and have been for a few days, I am vibrating, shaking like crazy. If this stress is not solved soon, I feel I will have a heart attack. I am not sleeping, maybe 3 hours at the most every night. On top of this my hip and leg is getting very sore, traveling back and forth. I have never had to travel this far before. Sitting on the bus for those many hours is bothering my hip and leg. It goes numb and then hurts an amazing amount and then my leg starts to shake. I need to stand but can't I get very anxious and want off the bus. But I can't. This causing me even more stress.
One thing I do know is this. I have spent many weeks thinking about what to do. Move to White Rock or not. I have always come back to Coquitlam. Where ever I was, and whatever country I lived in. It was my home. But it has not felt like home in a long time. It is just convenient. Everything is right within a block. There is no feeling either way about being a home, where I live. And I finally decide it is time to leave this behind. I made the decision to move to White Rock and this was not taken lightly.
I have never done this before. I always just moved, well just went. As I am moving to the east coast of the US, or I am going to Alberta. I just picked up and went. Never a thought about it. Now I had to really think about this. As I am leaving what use to be home, behind and starting over in a new city. Yes it is only White Rock. But I know no one their. Well I don't have any friends here anyways.
I have nothing and need everything. I am tired of having everything taken from me, as everything I had. And I have nothing now, because of it.
I even have a women wanting to come over to Canada,who wants to see me and spend time with me. I have been writing and talking with her for a while now. And this is causing me great anxiety. I can't have her come here. It is crap. It is a dead space and it is very depressing for me. Yes I have chosen to live poorly. But come on. I don't have to live with constant crap as I have lived with for many years now. I really have no real space or time to be me. Or even have people over to try to make friends with someone. I live in my room. And that is that. I have to deal with roommates who are just pigs and don't know how to clean. I do all the cleaning and it is a very stressful thing for me. Especially now, when everything is coming at me now.
I really need to move to White Rock to deal with the doctors and to be in a place where I can actually run my business properly. With a built in clientele. White Rock is know for its seniors population. And this is who my clients are.
I can not do any of this here in Coquitlam while having to travel everyday as I do. This is actually killing me physically and mentally and spiritually.
Not only is this getting to me, but being banned from walking mom and then the hospital does not even do it. As I thought would happen. Mom wants to walk and she needs the exercise. I know what my mother needs and she is not getting it.
This is why I need to move to White Rock. I need to get mom to places and see different doctors. This I cannot do from Coquitlam.
I am dying here. I need everything, I have a women coming from Europe to see me. And I want to see her. I am not feeling comfortable about this. I am having a very hard time deciding what to do about this.
Zulfiya has allot of hoops to run through just to get a visa to come here. It was her idea to do this. It is her vacation and she has never been to Canada. I would love to spend time showing her my city. The real city. Cooking with her. Talking face to face. Not over the Internet or via email. To walk with her, be with her. Not that way. I never even thought I would ever meet someone and that I would be single for the rest of my life, To die alone. But this is very strange to me.
I am stopping myself from even having feelings for her. I know I do and this is very strange to me. I have never felt anything about anyone in a very long time. I mean over 10 years. I don't know what to do.
This thing called money is the only thing stopping me from a complete change of life, to start fresh and anew. To begin again, with the thought I am doing the right thing and maybe fall in love again.
I pray with out ceasing all the time I am traveling. I PRAY TO GOD ALL DAY FOR A MIRACLE, AND SOON, as in right away. I am to stressed out.
I am in need of love in my life. I love my mother to death. But I need to have someone I can talk to when I need a hug or to just hold someones hand and walk through the park. Just enjoying each other's company. To discuss my ideas with, and for me to support them in what ever they do.
I think Zulfiya is making a mistake. I don't deserve to be loved. I am not a worthy person. I would like it as it may remove the despair in my heart. The loneliness that has dwelt in my soul for what has seemed like eternity. The feeling of emptiness, dreading the day, even upon awakening. There is a time when a soul can no longer take the desperation of being. The knowing that there is nothing that awaits him. the lack of even knowing that tomorrow will bring another day of isolation from the world. His speech diminishing with each passing hour. Not wanting to even say a word. Just nod.
I don't write Zulfiya, as I am waiting for a miracle when everything will come together in perfect harmony. I feel like I am in a dream and I am going to wake up one day and find out that it has all been a nightmare. And I am Ok.
I can't wait much longer, as Zulfiya is doing everything she can do to get over here and be with me. I know I have to write the letter telling her that I am nothing but a looser and not to come.
I can not keep this traveling up. I might not be able to walk one day. It is that bad. I think that tomorrow a knock will come to my door and their will be my angel with the funds I need to move and get everything I need for a household and money to keep myself going until my business takes off. And money to show Zulfiya around and make sure that her first trip to Canada is a fantastic one.
Only a dream, I say, only a dream. I will awake tomorrow morning and I will be just me, in the same place and when I go to look at another place. Just a hope that it will all work out. And maybe this will be the rebirth of a desperate soul. My life.
GOD Bless and good night
With love
Kris
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
I just don't know about anything.
Hello again
Today, I need to make a decision, well several decisions. And it is really stressing me out. I have no one to discus this with. I guess I should of been nicer to my old friends. Ok! I do get it. But I still need to make the decision to move to White Rock. I have looked at places, two to be exact. And I have a few more to look at.
My problem is I have absolutely nothing to move into it. No furniture, no living room, bedroom or kitchen furniture. Or even office furniture. Nothing where I live is mine, I do not even have kitchen things, as in dishes, pots and pans, cutlery. Or towels, sheets, oven mitts. A can opener. Knives, kitchen utensils. I need everything. And when I say everything I mean everything. No TV, stereo. Oh yea I have this computer, that I put together from other old computers. This is something though.
I do have in mind one place, a block away. I have to call this other place which a block away as well. I want to move to White Rock. I can not deal with the doctors, take mom to the physiotherapist, etc....
from Coquitlam. I need to be as close as possible. This way I can get their right away, if there is any kind of problem. You understand.
I have adsaac to get going. I need to get healthy. Speaking of this. Now the travelling is starting to hurt me physically. My right leg is starting to go numb, then it is very much in pain and then shakes like crazy and it wont stop. I have to stand up and this helps. But at first, it was only when I was almost home, now it starts not much after I start my journey. Even as I write this my leg is bothering me. I am up trying to walk and I am not doing this very well. My leg is not supporting my weight. Just great.
On top of all of this. I am completely broke, again, as usual. I ask that you all pray that something happens soon. I do feel that this is the right decision and I should be moving to White Rock.
I pray the entire time I am on the bus, train and bus. All the way their and back. I just don't know the answer.
The PGT is not going to help me, just as usual. They say something and then don't act on it. This is when I really do need a miracle. This is when I need help.
On top of this I have been writing with this women from Russia. And it has only been about a month. Now she is telling me that she wants to spend the rest of her life with me. And she is getting a vacation and wants to come to Vancouver to see me. And stay as long as I want her to stay.
I cant even manage my own life, let alone have someone come from another country and want to spend her life with me. I don't even want to spend my life with myself. I don't know what to say to her. I did not hear from her for a few days and I thought she had given up on me. But today I received two emails from her. I have not even read them yet.
I need to make decisions and I don't see her as being a part of them. Yes I would like to meet her and have someone to show around this beautiful city. But today I have asked GOD to give me an answer and please help me to move to White Rock and get furniture and everything else. This women is very beautiful. But I don't know if I am ready for anything.
I have to go. I am stressed out and I am in serious pain
GOD Bless and good night
Kris
Today, I need to make a decision, well several decisions. And it is really stressing me out. I have no one to discus this with. I guess I should of been nicer to my old friends. Ok! I do get it. But I still need to make the decision to move to White Rock. I have looked at places, two to be exact. And I have a few more to look at.
My problem is I have absolutely nothing to move into it. No furniture, no living room, bedroom or kitchen furniture. Or even office furniture. Nothing where I live is mine, I do not even have kitchen things, as in dishes, pots and pans, cutlery. Or towels, sheets, oven mitts. A can opener. Knives, kitchen utensils. I need everything. And when I say everything I mean everything. No TV, stereo. Oh yea I have this computer, that I put together from other old computers. This is something though.
I do have in mind one place, a block away. I have to call this other place which a block away as well. I want to move to White Rock. I can not deal with the doctors, take mom to the physiotherapist, etc....
from Coquitlam. I need to be as close as possible. This way I can get their right away, if there is any kind of problem. You understand.
I have adsaac to get going. I need to get healthy. Speaking of this. Now the travelling is starting to hurt me physically. My right leg is starting to go numb, then it is very much in pain and then shakes like crazy and it wont stop. I have to stand up and this helps. But at first, it was only when I was almost home, now it starts not much after I start my journey. Even as I write this my leg is bothering me. I am up trying to walk and I am not doing this very well. My leg is not supporting my weight. Just great.
On top of all of this. I am completely broke, again, as usual. I ask that you all pray that something happens soon. I do feel that this is the right decision and I should be moving to White Rock.
I pray the entire time I am on the bus, train and bus. All the way their and back. I just don't know the answer.
The PGT is not going to help me, just as usual. They say something and then don't act on it. This is when I really do need a miracle. This is when I need help.
On top of this I have been writing with this women from Russia. And it has only been about a month. Now she is telling me that she wants to spend the rest of her life with me. And she is getting a vacation and wants to come to Vancouver to see me. And stay as long as I want her to stay.
I cant even manage my own life, let alone have someone come from another country and want to spend her life with me. I don't even want to spend my life with myself. I don't know what to say to her. I did not hear from her for a few days and I thought she had given up on me. But today I received two emails from her. I have not even read them yet.
I need to make decisions and I don't see her as being a part of them. Yes I would like to meet her and have someone to show around this beautiful city. But today I have asked GOD to give me an answer and please help me to move to White Rock and get furniture and everything else. This women is very beautiful. But I don't know if I am ready for anything.
I have to go. I am stressed out and I am in serious pain
GOD Bless and good night
Kris
Monday, October 17, 2011
It is Sunday
Hello again
Well today I went and looked a basement suite in White Rock. It was nice, I have another to look at tomorrow. Two I think. And I have contact the owner of the suite I saw today on Tuesday. There are at least three more. And theses places are within a few blocks of the hospital. Cool I say.
Well I brought mom her fruit and drink. I need more. I also, right after dinner, I did her beauty treatment. I have to figure out how to get the music we listen to, on to something else. As it is only playing on my expense paper weight. My non working phone. It is a subscription service and I am having to open up new email accounts every month to keep it going. And the older phone that I thought would work, will ot except an sd card. Which is needed to play Slacker on this phone. There goes that idea. I will have to figure this out very soon.
Tomorrow, is Monday and this is when I might hear something about my previous blog.
It is a tough thing for me to just pick up and move. Oh I want to, but Coquitlam has been home for many years. And I know it is time to go. Move on. The one thing I keep forgetting is the fact that there is a beach down the road. I am only concerned about being close to mom. This place today was 3 minutes away, seriously. One thing is that nothing is central like it is where I am at. But when it is time to move on, it is time. I believe that the fact all these places are opening up are not a coincidence. I believe I am mean' to move. And I am ready.
I need everything, everything. Bedroom suite, living room suite. a kitchen table. All pots and pans and dishes and cutlery as well as all the kitchen gadgets that are required for a kitchen. This kitchen today was big with allot of counter space and cupboards. A den and my own washer and dryer.
I will look at the other places. I really need everything. And I need it all soon. As the first is coming up soon. Yes I will have to eat Novembers rent in Coquitlam. I feel this is what I have to do. I feel I am being guided into the next phase of my life. A new beginning. It is a wonderful feeling and I am just letting it happen. I pray all day. All the way into Vancouver, and to Richmond and then to White Rock.
105 kms of me praying. And I am not just asking for things for me, but for others as well. The one main thing is that I am getting hurt while doing this trip. It is painful with the bumps and quick stops with the bus and having to carry everything I carry for mom. My hip is getting really painful. I am having to take more and more pain killers. I am not happy about this fact. And I am falling more often. And tripping more often. What I bring for mom is very heavy.
I need to get help from someone. Maybe I should write Ellen, she loves to help people and I fit in to her category of need for a good reason.
I do not do this for myself, but I do everything for my mother. I do nothing for me. I go nowhere. I go for a tea with someone not very often. I go see mom and then I come home. And then the next day, I try to get things done in the morning, but I can't get much done. It takes me 2 hours to get my mind together to do anything. This is due to the fact that I get 4 hours of sleep. But I will do this without complaining. I love my mother.
I gave up on dating or having a relationship. I don't have the time and will not stop seeing mom at the times I see her. And I am to far to get things done at the hospital with the doctors. there is allot to do and speak with the doctors about mom's treatment plan.
I have to go now. I need sleep, and I know it will not happen for many hours yet.
I do need help please.
GOD Bless and good
Kris
Well today I went and looked a basement suite in White Rock. It was nice, I have another to look at tomorrow. Two I think. And I have contact the owner of the suite I saw today on Tuesday. There are at least three more. And theses places are within a few blocks of the hospital. Cool I say.
Well I brought mom her fruit and drink. I need more. I also, right after dinner, I did her beauty treatment. I have to figure out how to get the music we listen to, on to something else. As it is only playing on my expense paper weight. My non working phone. It is a subscription service and I am having to open up new email accounts every month to keep it going. And the older phone that I thought would work, will ot except an sd card. Which is needed to play Slacker on this phone. There goes that idea. I will have to figure this out very soon.
Tomorrow, is Monday and this is when I might hear something about my previous blog.
It is a tough thing for me to just pick up and move. Oh I want to, but Coquitlam has been home for many years. And I know it is time to go. Move on. The one thing I keep forgetting is the fact that there is a beach down the road. I am only concerned about being close to mom. This place today was 3 minutes away, seriously. One thing is that nothing is central like it is where I am at. But when it is time to move on, it is time. I believe that the fact all these places are opening up are not a coincidence. I believe I am mean' to move. And I am ready.
I need everything, everything. Bedroom suite, living room suite. a kitchen table. All pots and pans and dishes and cutlery as well as all the kitchen gadgets that are required for a kitchen. This kitchen today was big with allot of counter space and cupboards. A den and my own washer and dryer.
I will look at the other places. I really need everything. And I need it all soon. As the first is coming up soon. Yes I will have to eat Novembers rent in Coquitlam. I feel this is what I have to do. I feel I am being guided into the next phase of my life. A new beginning. It is a wonderful feeling and I am just letting it happen. I pray all day. All the way into Vancouver, and to Richmond and then to White Rock.
105 kms of me praying. And I am not just asking for things for me, but for others as well. The one main thing is that I am getting hurt while doing this trip. It is painful with the bumps and quick stops with the bus and having to carry everything I carry for mom. My hip is getting really painful. I am having to take more and more pain killers. I am not happy about this fact. And I am falling more often. And tripping more often. What I bring for mom is very heavy.
I need to get help from someone. Maybe I should write Ellen, she loves to help people and I fit in to her category of need for a good reason.
I do not do this for myself, but I do everything for my mother. I do nothing for me. I go nowhere. I go for a tea with someone not very often. I go see mom and then I come home. And then the next day, I try to get things done in the morning, but I can't get much done. It takes me 2 hours to get my mind together to do anything. This is due to the fact that I get 4 hours of sleep. But I will do this without complaining. I love my mother.
I gave up on dating or having a relationship. I don't have the time and will not stop seeing mom at the times I see her. And I am to far to get things done at the hospital with the doctors. there is allot to do and speak with the doctors about mom's treatment plan.
I have to go now. I need sleep, and I know it will not happen for many hours yet.
I do need help please.
GOD Bless and good
Kris
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