Hello again.
Today I was cold, wet, soaking wet and I think I blacked out for a while. You see I left my house at 2:07 PM I know, because The Price is Right just started and I got downtown at 3:50 soaking wet. Well I always leave at this time and I am always downtown at 3:15 3:20 no latter. Yes it was raining, Ice rain at that, but I don't know what happened to this time. I am not sure where it went. I really don't remember this time. But I was very wet and I have red spots all over my hands and face.
It could be because I have not eaten in, well now it has been two weeks. I know this because my roommate has been gone for almost 18 days now. And it was a few days after he left when I ran out of groceries.
The worst part of this is that I have nothing left to bring mom. I have no juice or coke left and I am feeling really bad about this. I was crying tonight when I was apologizing to mom for not having the drinks and fruit or snacks for her. It really hurts me that I cannot even buy mom her coke or banana colada fuze drink. Or even bring her cheese that she likes. If mom did not like her dinner, at least I would have fruit, a nice dessert, cheese, crackers and her drinks. And she at least ate something, and became full.
I can't even do this now. mom drank the last sip of her fuze drink and the last of the very, very flat coke tonight. I had nothing else to give her this evening and I am feeling extremely bad about this. And I don't know what I am going to do, tomorrow, Saturday. For her. I need to bring mom something.
I have been praying all day long to please let me find $100. today. But of course not.
Well remember I mentioned about craving Chinese food. Now I am dreaming about it. And my dream goes something like this. I go to the restaurant 1 block up from the hospital. And buy a whole bunch of different items. I take it to mom's and we go to her room and it is all spread out on her bed. Of course towels covering the bed. And mom and I just taking some off this and some of that. Just eating and eating. Laughing, talking, singing. listening to music. And just enjoying ourselves. And then I chocolate lava cake for each of us for dessert. That is exactly how my dream goes.
Man would I like to be able to do this for mom tomorrow, well today. I have nothing.
O yea I stink. I have never stunk before, My clothing stinks. And I cannot do laundry until Sunday, Late Saturday night.The clothing that I have worn everyday for the last month. Well washing it once a week. Last week I did not have laundry soap, and it did not come to clean and now I still have no soap and they just stink. Plain and simple.
I know I am depressed and I think I have a reason to be. Let's see now. In the last ten years, my Grandfather died of Dementia, and my father died of it as well. Now my mother has it. And there is no cure, none what so ever. Nobody even knows how one gets it. But it is a killer of our loved one's. And my mother and I are close. I have no problem admitting I am a mommy's boy. It does not bother me.
This blog is my way of letting It all out.
You know this is so out their that I could never make this up. I have never gone through anything like this.
As in today, I am absolutely starving and am willing to eat cardboard. But I want the things for mom.
OK I am starting to go and my mind is not in a good place right now. I am feeling extremely light headed.
So I need help and I have to go.
GOD bless and good night
Kris
Saturday, January 21, 2012
Friday, January 20, 2012
I am freezng cold and starving
Hello again
Yes it is correct when I say I am freezing cold and starving. My stomach has been growling all day long and I only have tea.
I have been wearing all the clothing I own for two weeks now. Yes I washed them once. On the weekend
Now mom is sick of me wearing these clothes and wants me to throw them out. But I say I have nothing else to wear. This is it.
They are filthy. And I cannot wash them until this weekend. Oh wait, I have no laundry soap. Well I will put them through the washer anyways. No dish soap either.
I spoke with the person at the PGT today and he was nothing but rude to me, and hung up on me and told me that they are not going to help me with anything. Even though I have emails with them saying they will help me with this or that.
But all he says is I never promised you that. Of course not. He just took over. This how they operate. Say something and then deny it.
So I am basically screwed. Nothing to give mom at all. I mean nothing. I do not even have her drinks. And mom loves those drinks, and she loves cheese. Since the food is tasteless, mom loves to have cheese with it. And I don't have this to give her.
I feel completely terrible. I know I will cry my face off when I get their and tell mom I don't even have her drinks for her. Her Coke and her Fuze drinks. Mom deserves a better son then me. At least someone who can take care of these little things, like to continue to supply her with her needs.
Not long ago everything was going well. I did not need help with anything. I was in Studying, and making enough to cover mom needs and I was able to spend time with her as well. OK I spend everyday with her. 3 hours anyways. But I don't have her spa products.
So I am at a point where my belief in GOD in not very good. I thought after having absolutely no money since the beginning of December. GOD would help me out. Not so.
I don't know what to think anymore. I need serious help and I have no one to call.
This is the part that makes me feel like I don't want to be here anymore. But mom keeps me from doing anything crazy.
I just wish I had something. Something. A miracle, would be nice. GOD reaching down and touching the PGT and getting them to keep their promises.
I am going now. I don't even know if I can keep writing this for a while. I just don't have the energy to do this. I am so tired and I need to keep my energy for going to see mom.
Just keeping warm, is difficult without food in me.
GOD bless and good night.
Kris
Yes it is correct when I say I am freezing cold and starving. My stomach has been growling all day long and I only have tea.
I have been wearing all the clothing I own for two weeks now. Yes I washed them once. On the weekend
Now mom is sick of me wearing these clothes and wants me to throw them out. But I say I have nothing else to wear. This is it.
They are filthy. And I cannot wash them until this weekend. Oh wait, I have no laundry soap. Well I will put them through the washer anyways. No dish soap either.
I spoke with the person at the PGT today and he was nothing but rude to me, and hung up on me and told me that they are not going to help me with anything. Even though I have emails with them saying they will help me with this or that.
But all he says is I never promised you that. Of course not. He just took over. This how they operate. Say something and then deny it.
So I am basically screwed. Nothing to give mom at all. I mean nothing. I do not even have her drinks. And mom loves those drinks, and she loves cheese. Since the food is tasteless, mom loves to have cheese with it. And I don't have this to give her.
I feel completely terrible. I know I will cry my face off when I get their and tell mom I don't even have her drinks for her. Her Coke and her Fuze drinks. Mom deserves a better son then me. At least someone who can take care of these little things, like to continue to supply her with her needs.
Not long ago everything was going well. I did not need help with anything. I was in Studying, and making enough to cover mom needs and I was able to spend time with her as well. OK I spend everyday with her. 3 hours anyways. But I don't have her spa products.
So I am at a point where my belief in GOD in not very good. I thought after having absolutely no money since the beginning of December. GOD would help me out. Not so.
I don't know what to think anymore. I need serious help and I have no one to call.
This is the part that makes me feel like I don't want to be here anymore. But mom keeps me from doing anything crazy.
I just wish I had something. Something. A miracle, would be nice. GOD reaching down and touching the PGT and getting them to keep their promises.
I am going now. I don't even know if I can keep writing this for a while. I just don't have the energy to do this. I am so tired and I need to keep my energy for going to see mom.
Just keeping warm, is difficult without food in me.
GOD bless and good night.
Kris
Thursday, January 19, 2012
I am really cold and pissed off
Hello again
Well I would like to start by saying I am a nice and decent person. I have always been. I have manners, I am open to talk to anyone. People tell me all their problems. I enjoy it.
I am honest, loyal. I will do anything and everything for my mother. You see, my mother was always their for me when I was young. My father worked hard and mom looked after the family. She took me to swim practice at 5AM.
People tell me I am blessed, and will be blessed. Well let's see now. I have no money and haven't had any at all in a very long time. I am literally starving. My stomach is ruined. I have lost over 50lbs in the last 7 months. And this is not from dieting and exercising. It is from going days and weeks at a time without eating.
It is freezing out side, and on top of that I am starving. I don't have enough clothing to keep warm. So I freeze.
I ask and ask the PGT to live up to their word. But guess what, absolutely nothing. I even phoned the Director today and nothing.
They are doing this to screw me, but little do they even realize. Oh wait, they know they are abuses mom. It is her money and they don't give a dam whether mom has her snacks and drinks and favorite things. Or even me cooking dinners for her, or picking up something to eat for her. Instead of eating the bland hospital. Mom does not eat or like what is being served. This is why I bring mom things.
Mom likes a good dessert. And by the PGT trying to screw with me and punish me. They are punishing mom, even more than me. This is not meant to be proud off, but I have gone many times without eating.
They are rude, and why do I say this. They don't even return my emails. This is what I mean by it is hard not to write negative things about them.
If nothing is wrong or bad, I guess I wouldn't have anything to write about. Then I guess I would write all positive things about the PGT and the case managers I deal with. I would write glowing comments about them.
And, you know what, I do. When they do good things for mom, I write about it and thank them in this blog. I write about making an apology to them if I need to. I have no problem admitting when I am wrong. I have no problem, telling the world about the good things the PGT and the hospital does.
If only they would do more good things. Then I would write about it. I am not a rude person at all. I dislike rudeness. I walk away, when I am speaking with someone and they answer their cell phone.
I open doors for people, I give up my seat to people. Even though I am disabled. I was brought up with respect for my elders and women. Give up your seat for a senior citizen or a lady.
This is the way I was raised. Manner,chivalry, respect for all.
And I have to starve and deal with the rudeness of the PGT everyday and have done for over 7 years now.
You really want to know what they are wanting from me. Is to bend over, do everything they say. Not to argue with them. Be completely submissive to their demands.
They make promises and do not come through. They tell me what mom needs and wants. They have never met mom or interacting with her.
You know, I really do want to write only positive things about the PGT and make them look as good as they think they are. OOPS there I go again. I is too easy.
I would spend my time with this blog writing only good things about everything. But come on now. This is not going to happen. I have spent 7 long and arduous years dealing with this.
I wish it would stop. I wish I could just write good things about each of the places I write about. The PGT and the hospital.
I am freezing cold all day and night. I have to stand for 20 minutes in White Rock waiting for the bus at night. And then 30 minutes in downtown Vancouver. While it is -15 degree's out. And it was -20 degree's when I got home. With the wind chill This is think, in it's self is abuse.
I cannot go on like this.But I will, even if it means freezing my ass off, or loosing my fingers to frost bite.
I have to go, I am starving and no food in my fridge, So off to bed I go
GOD Bless and good night
Kris
Well I would like to start by saying I am a nice and decent person. I have always been. I have manners, I am open to talk to anyone. People tell me all their problems. I enjoy it.
I am honest, loyal. I will do anything and everything for my mother. You see, my mother was always their for me when I was young. My father worked hard and mom looked after the family. She took me to swim practice at 5AM.
People tell me I am blessed, and will be blessed. Well let's see now. I have no money and haven't had any at all in a very long time. I am literally starving. My stomach is ruined. I have lost over 50lbs in the last 7 months. And this is not from dieting and exercising. It is from going days and weeks at a time without eating.
It is freezing out side, and on top of that I am starving. I don't have enough clothing to keep warm. So I freeze.
I ask and ask the PGT to live up to their word. But guess what, absolutely nothing. I even phoned the Director today and nothing.
They are doing this to screw me, but little do they even realize. Oh wait, they know they are abuses mom. It is her money and they don't give a dam whether mom has her snacks and drinks and favorite things. Or even me cooking dinners for her, or picking up something to eat for her. Instead of eating the bland hospital. Mom does not eat or like what is being served. This is why I bring mom things.
Mom likes a good dessert. And by the PGT trying to screw with me and punish me. They are punishing mom, even more than me. This is not meant to be proud off, but I have gone many times without eating.
They are rude, and why do I say this. They don't even return my emails. This is what I mean by it is hard not to write negative things about them.
If nothing is wrong or bad, I guess I wouldn't have anything to write about. Then I guess I would write all positive things about the PGT and the case managers I deal with. I would write glowing comments about them.
And, you know what, I do. When they do good things for mom, I write about it and thank them in this blog. I write about making an apology to them if I need to. I have no problem admitting when I am wrong. I have no problem, telling the world about the good things the PGT and the hospital does.
If only they would do more good things. Then I would write about it. I am not a rude person at all. I dislike rudeness. I walk away, when I am speaking with someone and they answer their cell phone.
I open doors for people, I give up my seat to people. Even though I am disabled. I was brought up with respect for my elders and women. Give up your seat for a senior citizen or a lady.
This is the way I was raised. Manner,chivalry, respect for all.
And I have to starve and deal with the rudeness of the PGT everyday and have done for over 7 years now.
You really want to know what they are wanting from me. Is to bend over, do everything they say. Not to argue with them. Be completely submissive to their demands.
They make promises and do not come through. They tell me what mom needs and wants. They have never met mom or interacting with her.
You know, I really do want to write only positive things about the PGT and make them look as good as they think they are. OOPS there I go again. I is too easy.
I would spend my time with this blog writing only good things about everything. But come on now. This is not going to happen. I have spent 7 long and arduous years dealing with this.
I wish it would stop. I wish I could just write good things about each of the places I write about. The PGT and the hospital.
I am freezing cold all day and night. I have to stand for 20 minutes in White Rock waiting for the bus at night. And then 30 minutes in downtown Vancouver. While it is -15 degree's out. And it was -20 degree's when I got home. With the wind chill This is think, in it's self is abuse.
I cannot go on like this.But I will, even if it means freezing my ass off, or loosing my fingers to frost bite.
I have to go, I am starving and no food in my fridge, So off to bed I go
GOD Bless and good night
Kris
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
Its cold out there
Hello again
It is frigging cold out there tonight. When I left today and arrived in white Rock it was already minus 5 outside and when I left mom's it was minus 12 and then when I got home it was minus 14 out. I had every thing I owned on and I was still so cold, my fingers were almost frozen solid. I shed a tear and it froze to my face. I had a walk of 1 km home after I got to the bus loop in Coquitlam. That seemed to be the longest walk of my life.
I do not have the clothing for this. But I will not stop going to see mom. Weather snow, nor sleet, nor wind, nor rain. Will stop me from my goal. My goal of never missing a day of visiting my mother. To always be there for her. As I promised her and my father before he passed away.
Now I have been wearing these same cloths for 4 days now and cannot wash them until Saturday. The jeans and shirts are starting to get dirty. And I really only have what I am wearing and because it is so cold out. I have to wear all of it and I am still cold. No toque, gloves nor warm coat.
I wrote the PGT again and said I am freezing cold and I am still going to see mom no matter what. I still need a phone as I am worried that I am going to fall and hurt myself and need a phone to call for help. As I have already fallen many times, but thank GOD I have not hurt myself.
I am not stable walking in this weather. With the cane, it is not very good. I need the special tip and the yaktrax for my feet.
Mom is doing OK. I can't stop hugging her. It is because I know that mom is at the end of year 7 and the average age is 10 years with this disease. I want to spend as much time as possible with her.
To do crafts with her. To put together a photo montage with her. To restore all of her photo's and put them on disk and make a photo frame. I want to be able to cook all the meals for her. Mom loves my cooking and I love cooking for her. I love to cook and I don't and won't cook for myself. Oh yea I don't have any groceries to do this anyways. Mom is not liking the food their. I don't blame her
Now when I am their lately, I cry allot. This is because I don't know no how long I have left with her. I just have been thinking about this lately. I am stuck in Coquitlam, the PGT is refusing to do what they promised me. A cheque for $10,000.00 which would solve my immediate problems. Enough time for me to get involved with the Alzheimer's association of BC. Part time. You see I don't even want to do this. As all I want to do is spend as much time as possible with mom. And do all the things she has not been able to do in the last 6 years. Since she has been warehoused. Yes I use this term, as it is the only way to describe the way it really is.
Mom should of been out enjoying her golden years doing things, shopping for herself. Not having me buy her bra's and clothing and everything else for her. Seeing her old friends, before they die too. Going places. As in road trips. Mom has never done this, and never even heard about this until I told her a few weeks ago. Get in the car and go. See where you end up and have lunch and go back home. Going to see plays and everything one would do in their golden years. This I want to do for her.
If I do take on employment, it has to be in the capacity of Psychology in some way. Research, helping people with this disease.
You see, this is where I mean I have lot''s of time after, latter on. Not now, it is mom;'s turn.
Mom's turn to shine. This will maybe awaken her senses and help her to extend her life and get back allot of what has been lost due to being warehoused.
I have to go, I am crying like a baby now, and my glasses are getting all steamed up and I am loosing it.
GOD bless and good night
Kris
HELP
It is frigging cold out there tonight. When I left today and arrived in white Rock it was already minus 5 outside and when I left mom's it was minus 12 and then when I got home it was minus 14 out. I had every thing I owned on and I was still so cold, my fingers were almost frozen solid. I shed a tear and it froze to my face. I had a walk of 1 km home after I got to the bus loop in Coquitlam. That seemed to be the longest walk of my life.
I do not have the clothing for this. But I will not stop going to see mom. Weather snow, nor sleet, nor wind, nor rain. Will stop me from my goal. My goal of never missing a day of visiting my mother. To always be there for her. As I promised her and my father before he passed away.
Now I have been wearing these same cloths for 4 days now and cannot wash them until Saturday. The jeans and shirts are starting to get dirty. And I really only have what I am wearing and because it is so cold out. I have to wear all of it and I am still cold. No toque, gloves nor warm coat.
I wrote the PGT again and said I am freezing cold and I am still going to see mom no matter what. I still need a phone as I am worried that I am going to fall and hurt myself and need a phone to call for help. As I have already fallen many times, but thank GOD I have not hurt myself.
I am not stable walking in this weather. With the cane, it is not very good. I need the special tip and the yaktrax for my feet.
Mom is doing OK. I can't stop hugging her. It is because I know that mom is at the end of year 7 and the average age is 10 years with this disease. I want to spend as much time as possible with her.
To do crafts with her. To put together a photo montage with her. To restore all of her photo's and put them on disk and make a photo frame. I want to be able to cook all the meals for her. Mom loves my cooking and I love cooking for her. I love to cook and I don't and won't cook for myself. Oh yea I don't have any groceries to do this anyways. Mom is not liking the food their. I don't blame her
Now when I am their lately, I cry allot. This is because I don't know no how long I have left with her. I just have been thinking about this lately. I am stuck in Coquitlam, the PGT is refusing to do what they promised me. A cheque for $10,000.00 which would solve my immediate problems. Enough time for me to get involved with the Alzheimer's association of BC. Part time. You see I don't even want to do this. As all I want to do is spend as much time as possible with mom. And do all the things she has not been able to do in the last 6 years. Since she has been warehoused. Yes I use this term, as it is the only way to describe the way it really is.
Mom should of been out enjoying her golden years doing things, shopping for herself. Not having me buy her bra's and clothing and everything else for her. Seeing her old friends, before they die too. Going places. As in road trips. Mom has never done this, and never even heard about this until I told her a few weeks ago. Get in the car and go. See where you end up and have lunch and go back home. Going to see plays and everything one would do in their golden years. This I want to do for her.
If I do take on employment, it has to be in the capacity of Psychology in some way. Research, helping people with this disease.
You see, this is where I mean I have lot''s of time after, latter on. Not now, it is mom;'s turn.
Mom's turn to shine. This will maybe awaken her senses and help her to extend her life and get back allot of what has been lost due to being warehoused.
I have to go, I am crying like a baby now, and my glasses are getting all steamed up and I am loosing it.
GOD bless and good night
Kris
HELP
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Another day and today I am pissed
Hello again
You know it is hard not to write negative things about the PGT when they are refusing help, to try to screw me. Because I called them Assholes. Well their was the F before. And this is how they are screwing me, by not helping and refusing mom everything. All her products and snacks and drinks and desserts etc... And everything else I bring her.
This is what they are doing to get back at me. No matter how many times I fall and can't get up. Without a phone I don't know what I would do. I wear the same clothes every single day of the week and only wash them once a week. And yes I wear everything I own at once these days. It is cold and snowing with lots of ice.
The bags I have are tearing apart. I need new bags. a phone. And clothing.I need to move to White Rock.
Tonight was an extremely emotional night for me. Mom is OK, but I could not stop crying/.I cried while feeding her. I cried while giving mom her spa treatment. I cried while hugging and kissing her. I cried while just holding her hand and singing to her.
Yes I hold her hand and sing to her. All the time. It is hard to be so far away from mom. If anything were to happen and I can't get their, I will freak out and well, I can't tell you what I will do. I first of all will be blaming the PGT, because everything thus far, that has gone wrong, is the result of the PGT not listening to mom's advocate. ME. And understanding mom is use to a certain routine with me and expects this every night.
Well my rant for the night.
I dislike people because of the lack of compassion that y'all have shown me and my mother for the last, many month''s and especially over Christmas where we had nothing. A crappy Christmas/
You know one day, one of your parents will have this disease and you are going to be screaming for help. And like myself, I hope you do get help. Unlike me who begged for help over and over again. And nothing.
This is why I dislike people. The lack of giving a dam. Y'all say you don't have time. You do.
I have food poising and I am starving. I am at day 9 of not eating this time. I might of just screwed my stomach. As it hurts like crazy.
I am always asking for this miracle to happen, but nothing. I have no tea left, either. The thing I live on.
Well I have to go
GOD bless and good night.
Kris
You know it is hard not to write negative things about the PGT when they are refusing help, to try to screw me. Because I called them Assholes. Well their was the F before. And this is how they are screwing me, by not helping and refusing mom everything. All her products and snacks and drinks and desserts etc... And everything else I bring her.
This is what they are doing to get back at me. No matter how many times I fall and can't get up. Without a phone I don't know what I would do. I wear the same clothes every single day of the week and only wash them once a week. And yes I wear everything I own at once these days. It is cold and snowing with lots of ice.
The bags I have are tearing apart. I need new bags. a phone. And clothing.I need to move to White Rock.
Tonight was an extremely emotional night for me. Mom is OK, but I could not stop crying/.I cried while feeding her. I cried while giving mom her spa treatment. I cried while hugging and kissing her. I cried while just holding her hand and singing to her.
Yes I hold her hand and sing to her. All the time. It is hard to be so far away from mom. If anything were to happen and I can't get their, I will freak out and well, I can't tell you what I will do. I first of all will be blaming the PGT, because everything thus far, that has gone wrong, is the result of the PGT not listening to mom's advocate. ME. And understanding mom is use to a certain routine with me and expects this every night.
Well my rant for the night.
I dislike people because of the lack of compassion that y'all have shown me and my mother for the last, many month''s and especially over Christmas where we had nothing. A crappy Christmas/
You know one day, one of your parents will have this disease and you are going to be screaming for help. And like myself, I hope you do get help. Unlike me who begged for help over and over again. And nothing.
This is why I dislike people. The lack of giving a dam. Y'all say you don't have time. You do.
I have food poising and I am starving. I am at day 9 of not eating this time. I might of just screwed my stomach. As it hurts like crazy.
I am always asking for this miracle to happen, but nothing. I have no tea left, either. The thing I live on.
Well I have to go
GOD bless and good night.
Kris
Monday, January 16, 2012
Craving Chinese food.
Hello again
So anther day, of mom being a little moody. She has a good right cross, got it while mom was waiting to go to the bathroom and get ready for bed. I was not expecting it. And bamm. Right out of now where.
Yet I did get to finish mom's spa treatment. So while waiting for the staff to take mom to the washroom I just gave mom a manicure. After the right cross. Mom has been very tired lately. This again is called sun downer.
The weekends seem to be ruff for mom. Friday nights I can understand, mom gets her bath for the week. It's this disgusting. A bath once a week. Other wise mom only gets clean when there is a mess. This is why I do what I do. Wash her face, lower legs, arms. And put the proper lotion on her. I have a different lotion/cream for her hands, face, legs, arms and feet. On mom's face I first put on a moisturiser and then after a bit I put on a night cream. I put on a eye serum, on her everyday. And lip balm.
I use a good brand. And I starting using this brand, Not going to say what company right now. No point giving them prop's unless they help subsidize me. Anyways I started using this brand many years ago. I got tired of shaving burns. I tired all sorts of products and finally went into the bay and went to the lady. I don't care what it costs as long as it gets rid of the razor burns. And it did, and I have not stopped using it since and I use this on mom. Biotherm. I the name of the company,.
What I don't like about them, is I have written them 3 times now, and no response. Not to good, with customer service. I push their product all the time. It is a great product and does wanders. I mean does wanders. I could make them a fortune. But I won't/.
My rant for the day.
I am still craving Chinese food, usually when I have this type of craving it is Mexican. I don't know why it is different.
Anyways I was walking to the bus stop and the crows by this creek were making allot of noise. I looked down and their was a bobcat. I have never seen one in real life before. Their he or she was. Trying to cross the creek, Hoy Creek in Coquitlam BC Canada. I took out my phone and took a picture. But the bobcat sat down for me. And then took off. Lots of good eats for it, in my neighbourhood, cats and little dogs. I have already sent off the picture to CTV news.
So I have everything I own on again, and this time, it is in the afternoon and I am very cold. Again, what a difference between a year ago and 50lbs lighter. And the ice and snow is becoming dangerous for me. I need the Yak Trax and the tip for my cane. I did not like the four falls I took this weekend and the ice and cold are still here My cane does not stabilize me at all through this. I am in extreme pain from all the falls I have taken this weekend. And I can't take much more of this.
Anyways, even on the way into Vancouver to get to Richmond, I had this craving for Chinese food. Still have it. It is a bummer, considering all I have is the peanuts that gave me food poisoning. And well I am not going to eat them. I need to have them checked out. My stomach is killing me as well. Not good.
Now I am on the train, going to Richmond, sitting up front, trying to get the picture of the Bobcat a little cleaner. And I move over, the train is getting crowded. And I see, out of the corner of my eyes this girl rush over, sit down and start to talk to me right away. An attractive Asian women at that. We talk for a while and then it is time for my stop and I say to Katherine I guess we will see you around, it would be nice. Right away she asked for my number and quickly grabbed a pen and paper and I wrote down my number in a hurry and jumped out of the train. I was picked up again. I blew the first one who tried to pick me up. The second, I was not really into.
I don't know what to think. Here I am in the same clothes I have worn for the last 3 months in a row. Yes I said three months in a row. Yes I wash them once a week, that is the only time I can wash them. So the only thing that gets changed everyday is the socks and underwear. And Katherine was well dressed, just came back from Church and attractive. Me I have not had a penny in my pocket for over a month and a half now.
I am expecting a call very soon from her, and she did say to me, she is in White Rock a fair bit. She did change this from once in a while. And I did say, yesterday I do not want a girlfriend or a wife, nor do I want to date. I could use a friend though.
Anyways. it is 1:37 AM and I need to be up early. My bus driver friend did say he will hold on getting rid of the deal, for a few more days. And I need things. As in a warm coat and some clothing. And a few dollars to go for coffee with this women.
GOD Bless and good night.
Kris
So anther day, of mom being a little moody. She has a good right cross, got it while mom was waiting to go to the bathroom and get ready for bed. I was not expecting it. And bamm. Right out of now where.
Yet I did get to finish mom's spa treatment. So while waiting for the staff to take mom to the washroom I just gave mom a manicure. After the right cross. Mom has been very tired lately. This again is called sun downer.
The weekends seem to be ruff for mom. Friday nights I can understand, mom gets her bath for the week. It's this disgusting. A bath once a week. Other wise mom only gets clean when there is a mess. This is why I do what I do. Wash her face, lower legs, arms. And put the proper lotion on her. I have a different lotion/cream for her hands, face, legs, arms and feet. On mom's face I first put on a moisturiser and then after a bit I put on a night cream. I put on a eye serum, on her everyday. And lip balm.
I use a good brand. And I starting using this brand, Not going to say what company right now. No point giving them prop's unless they help subsidize me. Anyways I started using this brand many years ago. I got tired of shaving burns. I tired all sorts of products and finally went into the bay and went to the lady. I don't care what it costs as long as it gets rid of the razor burns. And it did, and I have not stopped using it since and I use this on mom. Biotherm. I the name of the company,.
What I don't like about them, is I have written them 3 times now, and no response. Not to good, with customer service. I push their product all the time. It is a great product and does wanders. I mean does wanders. I could make them a fortune. But I won't/.
My rant for the day.
I am still craving Chinese food, usually when I have this type of craving it is Mexican. I don't know why it is different.
Anyways I was walking to the bus stop and the crows by this creek were making allot of noise. I looked down and their was a bobcat. I have never seen one in real life before. Their he or she was. Trying to cross the creek, Hoy Creek in Coquitlam BC Canada. I took out my phone and took a picture. But the bobcat sat down for me. And then took off. Lots of good eats for it, in my neighbourhood, cats and little dogs. I have already sent off the picture to CTV news.
So I have everything I own on again, and this time, it is in the afternoon and I am very cold. Again, what a difference between a year ago and 50lbs lighter. And the ice and snow is becoming dangerous for me. I need the Yak Trax and the tip for my cane. I did not like the four falls I took this weekend and the ice and cold are still here My cane does not stabilize me at all through this. I am in extreme pain from all the falls I have taken this weekend. And I can't take much more of this.
Anyways, even on the way into Vancouver to get to Richmond, I had this craving for Chinese food. Still have it. It is a bummer, considering all I have is the peanuts that gave me food poisoning. And well I am not going to eat them. I need to have them checked out. My stomach is killing me as well. Not good.
Now I am on the train, going to Richmond, sitting up front, trying to get the picture of the Bobcat a little cleaner. And I move over, the train is getting crowded. And I see, out of the corner of my eyes this girl rush over, sit down and start to talk to me right away. An attractive Asian women at that. We talk for a while and then it is time for my stop and I say to Katherine I guess we will see you around, it would be nice. Right away she asked for my number and quickly grabbed a pen and paper and I wrote down my number in a hurry and jumped out of the train. I was picked up again. I blew the first one who tried to pick me up. The second, I was not really into.
I don't know what to think. Here I am in the same clothes I have worn for the last 3 months in a row. Yes I said three months in a row. Yes I wash them once a week, that is the only time I can wash them. So the only thing that gets changed everyday is the socks and underwear. And Katherine was well dressed, just came back from Church and attractive. Me I have not had a penny in my pocket for over a month and a half now.
I am expecting a call very soon from her, and she did say to me, she is in White Rock a fair bit. She did change this from once in a while. And I did say, yesterday I do not want a girlfriend or a wife, nor do I want to date. I could use a friend though.
Anyways. it is 1:37 AM and I need to be up early. My bus driver friend did say he will hold on getting rid of the deal, for a few more days. And I need things. As in a warm coat and some clothing. And a few dollars to go for coffee with this women.
GOD Bless and good night.
Kris
Sunday, January 15, 2012
Snow day
CHRISTY CLARK, PREMER OF BC IS ALLOWING THE PUBLIC GUARDIAN AND TRUSTEE OF BC TO:
RUIN CHRISTMAS FOR MY MOTHER AND I
ABUSE MY MOTHER AND I
MY MOTHER HAS DEMENTIA AND LUNG CANCER.
Hello again
I sometimes forget how fragile one's life can be. Especially tonight with mom. I arrived on time and mom was already anxious, When we finished dinner, mom just wanted to go and get the spa treatment out of the way, and go to bed.
This was obvious when mom was getting irritated, by me taking so long to pack up and get her to her room. I spilled coke on her sweater and wanted to rise it out before it stained. I got everything together for the spa treatment and mom was getting angry, Basically telling me to hurry up. I was trying to rinse the sweater so I just put it down and went to and washed her face and put the lotions on. Even this was getting mom upset.
You see with Dementia, this is called sun downer. Good during the day and worse in the evening. I finished and got mom to the washroom and changed. I was going to do her feet, but this was not in the cards tonight, strainght to bed mom went and I put the lotion on her hands and brushed her hair and massaged her feet.
So this is where I am, I have been thinking about everything, again. Well I have made a decision and I have decided that I do not want to do anything else more than just to look after mom full time. I have lots of time, later on.
I will put TAAN The Angels Answer Network and ADSAAC Alzheimer's Dementia Seniors Abuse Action Coalition. on hold for now. I have thought long and hard about this.
I just want to look after my mother, and nothing else. Again, I have plenty of time for everything later on. I want mom to live with me, and I just want to do everything I can for mom.
I don't want to be married, I don't want to have kids, I don't want a girlfriend or to even date right now. I just want to concentrate on mom.
You see no matter what I think, I am always waiting for the phone call 24/7 365 I know it will be one day. But wait I have no phone. What is on this blog is a computer number, and I can listen to the messages on my email. But I can't phone out. You see, the CRT, Tube, big, older monitor, has no microphone and I do have one either.Yes I am using the old school monitor and a very old computer that I put together myself.
I can do all of this later on, now it is mom's time. Time to feel that at least one person cares and loves her. that one person will be their all the time. This is what I want To be their all the time for mom. 24/7. You know I can get help.
Now for my crappy day.
So I was suppose to meet my bus driver friend today, but of course the PGT did not answer me yesterday and so this makes two deals that I have been screwed over for. This last deal, Fido does not offer to anyone. It is not available to anyone outside the deal they made to the transit drivers. It would cost 50 dollars more a month, to get this deal. GONE I say, GONE
Oh the deals will be there after Christmas, well there was a deal. And I lost it. My friend had lots of people interested in this deal.
It snowed last night and froze as well, so today their was deep snow and icy conditions. Which is not very good for someone who walks with a cane. I fell three times today and I hurt. I could not of fell on the good side. No all three times on my right side. I am bruised and in pain. I need a special tip for my cane, which has sharp points on it. And I need yak tracks for the bottom of my feet. Yak tracks, slip over the boots and have spikes on them. This is need. And you think that the PGT would realize this, That if it snow, as the weather man/women predicted, they would understand and help. But of course not. They have some bug up their blank.
I said if they would of helped me on Friday I would not write about them. What they expect is for me to cave and kiss their mighty butt. Not going to happen anymore. I have given in to the PGT to many times to count. And it did nothing, but got me more grief. I am willing to compramise. But they want me to be totally subservient to them. To be their dog. Can't do it anymore.
So I had to walk at a very slow pace. And then on the way home, I had this over whelming feeling to take the bus through Surrey. I did not want to do this, as it would get me home to Early. Which is something I did not want to do. Nothing here for me. I am craving a meal, Chines food to be exact, but not going to happen.
Besides this, I believe I have a case of food poisoning. Or my stomach is just completely ruined. Anyways. I was given a gift card from my aunt. So I bought mom what she needed and I had a few dollars left over. So I decided to get myself something I can handle and snack on during the days. I bought some peanuts from Zeller's. Anyways, I ate some of them and later that day, my stomach just started to become completely painful, Bent over, double up pain. I have had food poisoning before and it is just like it. I thought nothing of it, so the next day I ate a bunch of them again, and it became even worse.
So today, on top of the pain, I am suffering from falling down today. I am doubled over in pain from my stomach. I still will not stop going to see mom. I am starving and need to eat. But I am in extreme pain at the same time. And I have nothing to eat in the house.
Today I also wore everything I owned again. And was still very cold. This is becoming very, very. I don't even know what to say. Mom told me to take the black soft shell pullover I have, off. Because she is tired of seeing me in it. I told her this is all I own, and it is cold out and I have to wear everything I own.
Anyways. I am in pain, my stomach is in pain. I need to go. Since I don't get any help from absolutely no one. I am going to leave now. I really do mean I get help from no one. At all.
So GOD bless and good night
Kris
t
RUIN CHRISTMAS FOR MY MOTHER AND I
ABUSE MY MOTHER AND I
MY MOTHER HAS DEMENTIA AND LUNG CANCER.
Hello again
I sometimes forget how fragile one's life can be. Especially tonight with mom. I arrived on time and mom was already anxious, When we finished dinner, mom just wanted to go and get the spa treatment out of the way, and go to bed.
This was obvious when mom was getting irritated, by me taking so long to pack up and get her to her room. I spilled coke on her sweater and wanted to rise it out before it stained. I got everything together for the spa treatment and mom was getting angry, Basically telling me to hurry up. I was trying to rinse the sweater so I just put it down and went to and washed her face and put the lotions on. Even this was getting mom upset.
You see with Dementia, this is called sun downer. Good during the day and worse in the evening. I finished and got mom to the washroom and changed. I was going to do her feet, but this was not in the cards tonight, strainght to bed mom went and I put the lotion on her hands and brushed her hair and massaged her feet.
So this is where I am, I have been thinking about everything, again. Well I have made a decision and I have decided that I do not want to do anything else more than just to look after mom full time. I have lots of time, later on.
I will put TAAN The Angels Answer Network and ADSAAC Alzheimer's Dementia Seniors Abuse Action Coalition. on hold for now. I have thought long and hard about this.
I just want to look after my mother, and nothing else. Again, I have plenty of time for everything later on. I want mom to live with me, and I just want to do everything I can for mom.
I don't want to be married, I don't want to have kids, I don't want a girlfriend or to even date right now. I just want to concentrate on mom.
You see no matter what I think, I am always waiting for the phone call 24/7 365 I know it will be one day. But wait I have no phone. What is on this blog is a computer number, and I can listen to the messages on my email. But I can't phone out. You see, the CRT, Tube, big, older monitor, has no microphone and I do have one either.Yes I am using the old school monitor and a very old computer that I put together myself.
I can do all of this later on, now it is mom's time. Time to feel that at least one person cares and loves her. that one person will be their all the time. This is what I want To be their all the time for mom. 24/7. You know I can get help.
Now for my crappy day.
So I was suppose to meet my bus driver friend today, but of course the PGT did not answer me yesterday and so this makes two deals that I have been screwed over for. This last deal, Fido does not offer to anyone. It is not available to anyone outside the deal they made to the transit drivers. It would cost 50 dollars more a month, to get this deal. GONE I say, GONE
Oh the deals will be there after Christmas, well there was a deal. And I lost it. My friend had lots of people interested in this deal.
It snowed last night and froze as well, so today their was deep snow and icy conditions. Which is not very good for someone who walks with a cane. I fell three times today and I hurt. I could not of fell on the good side. No all three times on my right side. I am bruised and in pain. I need a special tip for my cane, which has sharp points on it. And I need yak tracks for the bottom of my feet. Yak tracks, slip over the boots and have spikes on them. This is need. And you think that the PGT would realize this, That if it snow, as the weather man/women predicted, they would understand and help. But of course not. They have some bug up their blank.
I said if they would of helped me on Friday I would not write about them. What they expect is for me to cave and kiss their mighty butt. Not going to happen anymore. I have given in to the PGT to many times to count. And it did nothing, but got me more grief. I am willing to compramise. But they want me to be totally subservient to them. To be their dog. Can't do it anymore.
So I had to walk at a very slow pace. And then on the way home, I had this over whelming feeling to take the bus through Surrey. I did not want to do this, as it would get me home to Early. Which is something I did not want to do. Nothing here for me. I am craving a meal, Chines food to be exact, but not going to happen.
Besides this, I believe I have a case of food poisoning. Or my stomach is just completely ruined. Anyways. I was given a gift card from my aunt. So I bought mom what she needed and I had a few dollars left over. So I decided to get myself something I can handle and snack on during the days. I bought some peanuts from Zeller's. Anyways, I ate some of them and later that day, my stomach just started to become completely painful, Bent over, double up pain. I have had food poisoning before and it is just like it. I thought nothing of it, so the next day I ate a bunch of them again, and it became even worse.
So today, on top of the pain, I am suffering from falling down today. I am doubled over in pain from my stomach. I still will not stop going to see mom. I am starving and need to eat. But I am in extreme pain at the same time. And I have nothing to eat in the house.
Today I also wore everything I owned again. And was still very cold. This is becoming very, very. I don't even know what to say. Mom told me to take the black soft shell pullover I have, off. Because she is tired of seeing me in it. I told her this is all I own, and it is cold out and I have to wear everything I own.
Anyways. I am in pain, my stomach is in pain. I need to go. Since I don't get any help from absolutely no one. I am going to leave now. I really do mean I get help from no one. At all.
So GOD bless and good night
Kris
t
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