Which way to go, which way to go

Hello again

So the lady is home and the other is moving back. Now I am back to the BS. Already the place is a mess and it has only been 5 hours since they have been back. Great. NOT.

I will not be cleaning up after anyone.

Well I was speaking with the funeral director to put on a service for mom. It is expensive. But if I do allot myself, it will be less expensive.

The catering is what is the most expensive. Almost $400 just for the catering alone. So I think I will just do this myself. It will then only cost me about $450 for the service, provided I get my own pastor. Which I think I can. And do the catering myself. Plus the memorial table and slide show. Yes the flowers are going to be a huge cost. So I think I might ask my cousin if he will donate flowers for the service. Maybe, who knows.

I have so much stress at the moment. Not just with this, but with everything. I have allot to do over the next month. Many appointments and packing to move. Then the move it's self. I still have to go back and get the landlord to re-do the tenancy agreement. It is not right according to.............

Speaking with the funeral director, she gave me a card that has the number of free counseling services. Counseling for a year, 1 hours a day. Paid for by the funeral home. This is great because the grief counseling I am currently going to, runs out in two more appointments.

I am not well............................

I am not sure if I can make it through all of this. The diabetes is killing me. The stress from living here is great. It was fine for a week, while the lady was in the hospital. By myself and the place was clean. Not anymore.

I do need help with allot of things. I have to right a resume. NOW. And I have no one. I am paying the price for being a loner.

Anyways I can't write anymore tonight. Not thinking straight. Feeling very bad and depressed. Some friends want me to go to the PNE ( An annual exhibition that takes place here in Vancouver, the last two weeks of August) I have so much to do, I need the time to get things done. Also I need to leave my home at 7 am to get there by 10 am. Also I have an appointment in Vancouver tomorrow afternoon with my counselor. I will still see her.

GOD bless and goodnight

Kris Schmuland

And then there is more

Hello again

So if it doesn't rain stuff, it is pouring stuff. You know what I mean by "stuff". I let the landlord know I am moving at the end of September. When I was speaking with him, I found out that the lady here has not paid this months rent. Yes August's rent. I paid my rent to her at the beginning of the month and it was, well not used to pay rent. And have already paid my rent for September. I thought we were caught up. That is what I was told, anyways.

When I arrived back here, there was a eviction notice under the door. Which did not have my name on it. Yes I am on the lease. But not on the eviction notice. Not good for me. I can't even take the notice to the residential tenancy branch to help me extend my stay. To fight it.  They want us out by September 8, There is an entire house full of stuff that has to be moved. OK I am only responsible for my belongings. But still I can't be out by the 8, I don't move into the new place until October 1. So here is another problem that I face. I have no place to put my stuff or live until the 1st.

What I will have to do is talk to someone right away. I have a full day tomorrow, so Wednesday I am at it.

Besides this problem. My pain now is getting worse. It is a deep seeding pain. That is taking over my life, completely. The pain of my loss,

And my diabetes is not going well. I am crashing during the day. Even though I am taking my medication on a regular basis.

I am not sleeping and this eviction notice is not going to make me sleep any better.

Let us not forget all the pain I feel physically and my emotional/psychological issues

So to conclude this segment in my strange life.

I have a place to live. Works out great. I am going to be renting with a friend, who works out of town. He is only in town every 10 days for a few days. He is recently separated and is tired of paying for hotels. So my rent is not changing. It is almost as if I am going to be living on my own. But, you know the but. We can't move in until the 1 of October.

I have no one to talk to about this, either. I am very angry at the moment. I am angry at the lady for not paying the rent and is forcing me to be out of here, when I can't be. I will be speaking with the landlord tomorrow about having the eviction notice changed so my name is on it.

I am out.

Please pray for me. I need it about  now.

GOD bless and good night

Kris Schmuland

This is my life, one thing after another and this is not my fault. OK yes it is, I trusted the lady would be paying the rent or have paid the rent for August.