And then

Hello again

It has been awhile, OK, maybe a week. Anyways I have a question. Can I hear myself speaking, when I do go deaf?

I am not hearing the chirping sound of the crosswalk anymore. I can't hear people walking up on me. Or cars coming up from behind me.

I have been dealing with the PGT and there refusal to do the right thing. Mom is out of most of her cosmetics,which are used daily. And the PGT is refusing to do anything about it. I try, but at the moment I am broke again. And I mean really broke.

I will figure something out. If I have to go from store to store and get some samples, I will do this. Wouldn't be the first time. And dealing with PGT, it won't be the last time.

Mom has been very tired again. The home is not doing anything about her roommate and keeping the light on and TV on all night long.

I will contact them, one more time. Maybe this time, the social worker will actually call be back. Though the three time I called this week, she never returned any of my calls.

That or get there really early and speak to her in person.

Other than this, mom is healthy, I calm her down,when she is tired and gets aggressive.

I am the only one who can calm her down. Or the staff gives her drugs;. And I get really upset at the mention of this.

But I need to go to bed. Tired and weak.

GOD bless and good night.

Still no help getting the hearing aids. Don't know what I am going to do.

Kris Schmuland

And then

Hello again

Yesterday I over heard someone saying that they don't know if they can live on $2800.00 take home each month.

I almost started to yell and scream at them. Saying that I live on exactly $25.00 per month. I don't get anymore. After I pay my rent, that is all I have left over.

I am dirt poor, actually, dirt is richer than I am. With all the minerals in it. I would say that I am on the same level as depleted dirt. Without. It is useless, as I am. I am constantly hungry. And I only right it on here. I tell no one. I tried that and nothing came from it. Nothing at all.

I wrote the newspaper, TV, and radio. Telling them about my plight and how, no matter what I am their,caring for my mother.

And they passed the buck to another agency, who did absolutely nothing for me. I am still depleted dirt poor.

Then the PGT, in all of their wisdom, tells me about a net benefit to my mother,. That the PGT helping get to White Rock, is not a net benefit to mother.

What is a net benefit to mom?

Me being closer and being able to be their more often, to handle the medical and social issues as they arise. Is this, not a net benefit to mom.

To be their and get mom up walking and exercising her legs. Is this, not a net benefit to mom.

Taking her out and see the sights around White Rock or bringing her over for a lunch or visit, Is this, not a net benefit to mom.

To be their to feed her breakfast or lunch as well as dinner Is this, not a net benefit to mom.

Are any of these items a net benefit to my mother. The PGT doesn't think so.

But think it is a net benefit to spend 10's of thousands of HER money on a companion service and take a van away from me. ( Which could now be converted to handle wheelchairs).

Or to charge her outrages fee's to handle her fiances. They say they are in charge of her legal affairs as well. But I have yet to see the PGT take care of any of the legal matters that have come up.

ABUSE is the major one.

But helping me move to White Rock is not a net benefit to mom. Go figure! Well not.

Mom is not eating well, she has a roommate that keeps her up at night. The social worker does not return my calls. These are things that need to be addressed in person.

Then their is myself, who needs hearing aids, put a campaign up on indiegogo for help. Yet nothing, zero. I have lost so much weight  that none of my clothes fit me anymore. Can't afford to get new one's.

But all of this is OK, as I only want to take care of mom. And that is it.

Yes I am a looser, and have nothing.

But I have the love of my mother. My mother knows that she has someone that will be there for her all the time. Someone to count on.

I am blessed by taking care of mom.

I just need to be their more often and do the things for her, she needs done.

GOD bless and good night

Kris Schmuland

I am not sure

Hello again

Today I am very worried about mom. She is not eating much at all for dinner these days. It has been at least three weeks since mom ate a full dinner.

And the way mom was acting this evening I thought she was going to pass away. I was and am freaked out. Mom was out of it. So very, very tired.

Enough is enough, something has to be done about her roommate and it needs to  be taken care of now. I will be speaking with her daughters. And I don't give a crap what they think. My mother's health is being affected. And this is going to stop. Otherwise mom will become extremely sick and will cause her death.

This is where I need to have siblings to do something as well. But since I don't I will be dealing with this myself.

The way mom has been feeling, this could very well be her last year.

And mom refusing to eat, caused me to cry like a baby. I was extremely emotional. It is my mom. I love her. I don't want her to die.

And now is the time that I need GOD to grant me that miracle. I don't know how much longer mom can take this. Not long I am sure. She needs sleep. As we all do. Not with a TV blaring and the lights on. Plus someone calling for the staff all the time, or talking away to herself.

MOM NEEDS SLEEP. This is the only way mom can stay healthy. And if this keeps up I am afraid mom will pass away.

I will be on the phone with the social worker first thing Monday morning. To make sure it gets done this week.

I need to be living in White Rock and now. I need to be their for mom, to be speaking with the staff every single day. If need be.

I need help. And I need it right away. I can't wait any longer.

I hate coming home at night, I don't want to be here anymore. I need out. And for me to do this I need help.

Which seems that it is not possible. I am going deaf, but do you think I can get help with getting hearing aids. Not at all

I start a campain and nothing. I ask my medical for help and not eligible. I am disabled, but can't seem to get on disability. Then I would be covered for hearing aids. And by the time I get on disability, my hearing will be worse off.

Not to mention, I need to be around mom more often now. I don't know what to expect anymore.

My worst fear, is that I get a call at 3:00 am and I can't get their to be with mom. I need to be their for her in the morning and then in the evening. I need to be their for her, to get her up and try to get her walking a bit. To excises her legs.

I need to build a mirror box to get mom's use of her left hand back. ( I don't have the funds to build it)

I need to have the PGT keep their promises. I would be living there already. If they were to keep, even one of their promises.

They lie and cheat all who are involved with them. They are basically stealing the money from their clients.

Once again, I have a huge hate on for them, for taking the van away from me. Which I could of had it equip with a ramp. And then spending 10's of thousands of dollars of mom's money on a companion service. I mean more money than you would think that would of been spent. I would say at least $50.000.00 Most likely more.

And they tell me they are in charge of her legal affairs. Well abuse is a legal matter. And mom is being abused.

Right now I am so depressed and will probably tear up after I finish writing this. I am very upset.

I am extremely upset at GOD for not doing what HE has promised in his words.

GOD bless and good night.

I am clueless as to what to do.

Kris Schmuland

All I do and want to do is be their for mom. To take care of her. And I can't do all as I live so far away and no means to even move their.