Some people must think everyone is just stupid

Hello again

It is going to be short and to the point this evening.

Today I meet my younger sister to pick up my mother's wheelchair. I meet her, I take it out of the back of her SUV and to my surprise, (OK I had a feeling about this, when it was left at the home) both sets of wheelchair legs were not there. The one Elevating legrest set, which was just purchase less than a year ago, plus the standard set of legrests that came with the chair. Both gone. What was left was one Elevating legrest. (One, I mean there was only one Elevating legrest attachment, not two, just one) that was old and used. It had a nail in the locking mechanism slot. This stops the leg from coming un-attached from the chair.

Also there were two adjustable flipup footpads, that came with the original legrests. Now the sling that held mom's legs up was also gone, plus two brand new calfpads, as well as two adjustable flip footpads These calfpads came with the elevating legrest, but were no good for mom, they just didn't hold her legs up. That is why I got the sling. This just went from one leg to the other.  The calfpads, the original legs for her chair, where in the closet when mom passed away. I saw them. I knew they were there. As a matter of fact, I was the one who ordered the Elevating legrests for mom. Well because these fools could not figure out what to do for mom and the fact her legs were so stiff. It took me no time at all to find the Elevating legrest for mom's chair.

GONE, EVERYTHING GONE. JUST LIKE THAT.


Now the Elevating set of legrests are over $750.00 with the pads

The sling is $75.00

The adjustable flip footpads are $70.00 a piece. for a total of $140.00

The original set of legrests are $450.00

Now the total of everything that is missing is as follows.

$1450.00 plus tax. So basically well over $1500.00



This wheelchair was over $3500.00 new.

Now it is a useless wheelchair. If I even wanted to sell it, I couldn't. And I have no interest in selling this chair. It was and is part of my mother. And I will hold on to this.

So let me take you back to just after mom passed away. The day after, as a matter of fact. I went into the home. Al Hogg third floor. And spoke with the manager Lisa Humphreville ( Do you want her email and phone number, let me know) I mentioned about the wheelchair, how it will take me a few days to arrange a ride to pick it up. She immediately tells me that that is not going to happen, don't worry about picking up. As in these cases the Public Guardian and Trustee of British Columbia, donates the chairs to the homes.

I immediately let her know, that I will not be donating a $4000.00 chair to Al Hogg. That is a ridiculous idea.Not going to happen. She insists that this will happen.

Lisa Humphreville, wanted this chair, in a big way. $$$ in her head. How she can take it apart and give the pieces to others residents.

I WAS NEVER GOING TO DO THIS.

I should of taken it the night mom passed away, when my cousin was there with her truck. But no, I didn't do this.

Because of not taking it right then and there, my sisters said that I will never get it. So it went into probate. The Public Guardian and Trustee of British Columbia, picked it up and took it to there warehouse. In the middle of February.

So from Al Hogg to the PGT warehouse in Burnaby.

From there it was picked up from the warehouse on Friday, by my younger sister. She put it in the back of her SUV and delivered it to me, today, being Saturday.

Now it sat in the PGT's warehouse since the middle of February, until Friday, May 27, 2016. No one in the warehouse is going to take it. I think. And my sister, well I still don't trust anybody, yes including her. Just trust issues. I don't think she would of taken them. They only fit the one chair. It has to be an exact match of chair. The Orion 11 wheelchair.

I know it was the staff at Al Hogg who took the pieces of the chair. And I know this because through out the time mom was there, when I got something new for her chair, the staff would take the older part and let someone else use it. This is without even asking me first, it they could do this. Just took it. I always said where is this part, They said we used it for someone else's chair. No you don't, I want it back, right away. Well this is how we usually do it. You didn't ask so therefore I want it back. Even if you would of asked, the answer still would of been no.

I know they read this blog. Some of them, anyways. So here it is.

On Monday, I am going to the RCMP here in White Rock and file a complaint. I want whoever took the parts of my mother's chair charged with theft

I will also be contacting the PGT. I will speak with the individual at the PGT's warehouse, As well as the local newspaper and anyone else who I think should know about this theft.

If they took it, I want it back by the end of Monday May 30, 2016

What I know is they thought I won't notice it. As I am sure they thought that it is in Probate and it will take a  very long time to go through probate. Well guess what. It didn't take that long. It has only been 3 months.

I am going now.

GOD bless and good night

Kris Schmuland

Just a frustrating day

Hello again

I have no idea why it is this way today. I didn't even get out of the house until after 3 pm and this is unusual for me. I am usually out by 1 or earlier.

Why I think is that I have not had a full night sleep in a very long time. Even before I moved here, but it is worse since I moved her. The woman in the wheelchair is always asking for something. In the middle of the freaking night. She yells Kris, Kris. I got myself caught on my oxygen cord. She does this all the time. She just doesn't get it, when I tell her I need sleep and you have to be careful and not do this. Then she will ask me to make her some toast. This is in the middle of the night. 3 pm or so. I tell her no.

Then all day long she wants something. Can you do this, can you do that. Yet she can do things for herself. But no.....

This women should not be on her own. She needs constant help and attention. So  on top of her asking for things all the time. I wake up at 4 am every night. I have no idea why. Just do.

So I don't get much sleep at all.

And today, I say hello to mom first thing in the morning, then get up. The constant asking starts right away. I mean I don't even have time to have a smoke or just wake up.

This is why I need to move. And truthfully, I don't know where to move now. I don't have to stay in White Rock anymore. I can go anywhere. I mean anywhere.

I miss the tree's and the fresh air of Coquitlam. The parks, lakes, the mountains. White Rock has it's advantages. The ocean is right here. A 20 minute walk for me. But I have to take the bus back up. To steep for me. As it is I am in pain, just walking down there.

Now I need to give mom a memorial service and I am asking for your help again.

I have to continue to do this as I don't have the funds to pay for a service.

https://www.gofundme.com/ka556fdk

Thank you

I am just really messed up right now. Need help of a doctor. I am in pain 24/7 365. I mean in constant pain. Without a break, all day long. And not to mention my depression. And my OCD is really acting up lately. Plus, plus, plus..............................................

I have to go now. I am tired and I have to be up early to get my mother's wheelchair. Then re-arrange the storage locker to put it in there.

So.............


GOD bless and good night

Kristopher Schmuland

Anxiety

Hello again

I feel hollowed out inside
More broken than
I have ever felt in my life
My life came to an end,
When my mother passed away
What I was
I am no more
I feel completely empty now.
Filled with the emptiness
I feel for the loss of
My mother
My friend
Before I can move on
With my life
I have to fill the emptiness
Which is inside me.
To become the person
My mother can see
That I am to be


GOD bless and good night

Kristopher W. A. Schmuland

What and why

Hello again

Back again. So soon you say. I need to start to write daily again. It is very cathartic for me.

So today because of not being able to sleep properly for the last several weeks, I missed an appointment with a grief counselor. My sleep problem started just before Mother's Day. And has continued to this day.

That was the hardest day for me. I just can't stop thinking she is still around. I miss so much about taking care of her. My fondest memory is holding her hand each night, while mom fell asleep. I just can't stop thinking about this.

I have her ashes and I talk to her daily. I think I am loosing my mind, but that is the way it is. So I loose my mind. It is not being used for anything purposeful at the moment. I called the grief counselor back, but she wasn't' in the office. So I left a message explaining my insomnia. How since Mother's day it has been really bad.

I am very tired and just not doing well.

I am in a place, as I explained it to y'all already, where my life is not going well. I just can't take it here anymore. But because I took care of mom, all those years. I have bad credit, so this is going to make looking for a place more difficult. I will succeed. I just have to keep telling myself this. Or I will really loose my mind.

I have to be out by the end of June. I can't do it anymore. I can't constantly, daily, being asked for something. Though I make the least of all three of them. They are asking me for things. That is what happens when you are drug addicts. And I can't be around this. My health is suffering.

So I don't stick around much during the day. Hence just riding the bus. Just to get away from this nonsense

My mood is just meh. That's it.

I am experiencing depression about moving. Thinking this is what I deserve. I don't deserve to be living on my own and having something. I deserve to be living with these people.

It was my fault that I ended up here. No one else to blame.

I need to eat and sleep. I have to go.

Until tomorrow night.

Please help me to give mom a memorial  service. I can't move on until this happens. Please donate to

https://www.gofundme.com/ka556fdk

GOD Bless and good night

Kris

Nowhere and nothing

Hello again

So today was the day that I realized I am going nowhere and getting there fast. I didn't want to be where I am living. So I left with no direction, but to go. I went nowhere and did nothing. OK if you call getting on a bus and doing a very large circle.

I went to Langley, then to Maple Ridge and then to Coquitlam. From there I went to downtown Vancouver. Once downtown, I needed to use the restroom. Washroom for the Canadians. Off to the Hotel I went, then jumped on a Skytrain back to Surrey. Went to WallMart and looked around. Back on a bus back to White Rock.

That killed 5 hours of doing nothing, talking to no one. Just riding the bus. That is not very healthy. I just can't sit here and deal with these people.

So I guess going nowhere and doing nothing, was a better choice of things to do today,

I even have a book which I borrowed from the library, and haven't started to read it yet. It is due, Wednesday. Guess I will be renewing it. I want to read it. I have and had plenty of time to do this, but I would rather do nothing. Just stare off into nowhere.

I thought I had some friends out here in White Rock, but I am mistaken. Every since last weekend, when I asked one of them to stop talking so I could tell him something. Then he hung up on me. Well that is that. I will not tolerate someone hanging up on me. He is a creature of habit. Goes to  the same restaurant, daily, has the same things. I been there with him and it is $20.00 to eat at this place. And he goes everyday. He makes tips cutting hair in the barbershop. So he can afford it. I can eat for many days on $20.00. Lots of chicken for me. And fresh vegetables as well

Bu anyways, Since that day, last Sunday, he has not called or emailed me or even FB ,me/ He was to busy that day, spending it watching the fire we had in White Rock, taking pictures of it and posting it online. Not my cup  of tea.

Not going to work as friends. So OK, I would rather be by myself than deal with a person who hangs up on someone and does not apologize for doing so.. Just rude.

Really I just want my own place, decorate it the way I want it. And just be left alone. Yes very dysfunctional one would say. And I do agree. This is, of course, the way I ideally would want it. But we need people in our lives. Told to me by most people and read in many articles and white papers from John's Hopkins, The Mayo Clinic, Berkeley Health. These are the articles I get emailed to me on a regular basis. Yes I receive many articles on Alzheimer's Dementia and strokes from these Universities as well. Even before I started to receive articles on Mental Health.

Research over the years for my mother. How to make her life better with each stage of her Disease. All of it helped, along with my own way of doing things. Things that I knew where the right way of taking care of someone with this illness.

I am not a stupid person. In fact I am very intelligent. I read white papers on a variety of subjects and always have. I study behavioral science and have for many years. Even before mom and dad became ill.

So once again I find myself being alone, this time by choice. And I feel this is a choice that I will be making often.

GOD bless and good night.

Please help me give mom a memorial service. Her ashes sit, waiting for something to happen. As you  can see by what I wrote. I am in no position to do anything about it.

https://wwwgofundme.com/ka556fdk

Kristopher W.A.Schmuland