Hello again
It is time that I wait on GOD I have asked and asked and now I cannot do anymore except wait.
I have received some comments and they go on to say that I am a very selfish person. Interesting. As I do everything for my mother first. My closet is empty because I say to mom what's mine is yours and I will give it to you. Which I have, and that is why my closet is empty. If I get money it is first spent on mom and if their is anything left over I get myself something.
I want to move to White Rock to be closer to mom. I was happy living in Coquitlam, until I made up my mind to move to White Rock. And now I don't want to live here anymore and want to move to White Rock. Wow. It is to start a new life. Ok a life. Which I have none now. I just need what has been promised to me and a way I go.
To bad it won't include having Zulfiya come over. I can't say that for sure yet. There is still time. She gets 3 weeks of holidays and does not start them until the 9 of November. So again if anyone wants to help out. My phone number and address are on the previous blog.
Now I really really need to move to White Rock and get furniture and well everything that is needed for an apartment.
I really do miss the letters I exchange with Zulfiya.
So when I left he hospital tonight I had a huge smile on my face. It is a great feeling that I can do for my mother and make her happy. Like her nightly beauty treatment. And the fact I am the last person she sees before falling to sleep. And I know I made my mother's life a little better. Being struck in this place is not good. I need to be close by to get her out of their and over for a visit or lunch or dinner. And then over night.
I would just like something good to happen in my life for a change. To use this goodness to help mom and others in her situation. To stop the use of anti psychotic medication being used on my mother and others.
I do deserve it. Not for doing this for mom, but it is my turn to do some good in this world. I try and try, and what happens when I really want something to happen, Is what is happening. I live where I don't what to live. I do this because I have to live like this. To make sure mom has everything she needs and will keep doing this if need be. But I would like help so this does not have to be this way.
To start a new life in White Rock, and maybe with someone else at my side, so both of us can help my mother and I have someone to talk to. Zulfiya I mean.
So if I am selfish, then so be it. If I want the best for my mother and I am willing to do what is necessary, than so be it again. I am selfish than. I just want something different.
And no one out their can understand what I am going through, or they do not even want to. To bad, it is happy, sad and wonderful
I need to go to bed, as I am usually up until 4 am writing and I need sleep.
GOD Bless and good night
Kris
