Hello agian
I did everything right last night to go to sleep early. Yet I did not sleep, every few hours I was awakened. Don't know why, but this just was the way it was. This made for a very tiring day. It still is hard to bare the fact that mom is gone, passed away. Her birthday was very difficult for me. Being the first birthday without her. Just not there yet. To difficult to bare for me. I spent the day, yesterday, just remembering mom. This is easy, no problems with remembering mom. She is with me all the time, everyday. I still clearly remember holding her hand, her looking forward to me getting there each day, her reaching out to hold my hand.
So the closes I can get to my mother, is her aunt, my great aunt. So I decided I am going to spend time with her. I went down to where she was living, but no one could tell me what room she was in, they told me she was moved to the other building. Off I went to that building. Not there either. The building she is to be in, called the other building, because they could not find her name on the list of residents. And I was told she was up there on the third floor. Well she was on the third floor in the building that I originally went too. I left. I will have to go back tomorrow to find to see what the deal is.
I called and texted my cousin, her daughter, and asked what room she is in, where she is, what happened to her. Yet no answer, as usual. She is my great aunt, mom's aunt, almost a sister to mom. I just want to be able to visit her.
Well that was my evening, besides doing some laundry.
Today, I was at the job club, resources it is called. They have computers, faxes and assistance to find a job. I was on there computer for hours. I applied for numerous jobs. Yet no luck so far. Isn't it weird, that when I first started looking for a job, I sent out 8 resumes and got three job interviews and a job. Again that job lasted 3 days. They wanted to go a different way. I knew how to do that job,with ease. OK I will stop dwelling on the loss of that job and look to find a new job.
I need it right away. Any help from anyone would be appreciated. Yet it seems that I am holding my breath waiting for help from anyone. It just never materializes.
I wanted to be in a different place, and this place is nice. To bad the roommate decided to find a place up where he works. I understand. But it left me in a bad situation. I am trying to work on this. Everyday I am at it.
What I need is GOD to put me in the right place or together with the right people to help guide me in the right direction.
So I need to go now. Time to eat. But I am not very hungry. Very tired though. I do hpe I will have a good nights sleep tonight.
GOD bless and good night
Kristopher Schmuland
