Hello again
Well today has been both good and bad. First everything that could go wrong did. Well when I left my jeans where clean and then half way to Vancouver I noticed that their was a huge stain on my right leg of my jeans. I have no clue where it came from. Then I get off the bus and I had left a full package of smokes on the bus. It is Ok they were rolled smokes. And disgusting one's at that. Get it. Think about it.
So my visit with mom was very good. Mom was happy to see me and I her. I do realize I am truly lonely now. Mom is getting use to the time change and she ate most of her dinner tonight. That is great. So I was cleaning up and going through things and I found almost 10. dollars in change. Yes dimes, nickles, quarters. And I brought mom dinner. This is why she ate all of her dinner. The dinner they served her was a cabbage roll, very bad and rice. Mom would not of eaten this. Then I had enough change left to buy mom a drink.
Well I am in the store and at the cashier, I lost the change. It turned out that I have a whole in the pocket where I put the change. Not the other pocket. Where the change was to begin with. No I had to change the pocket. Thank GOD I had my keys in my bag. While feeding mom, I got sauce all over me. Of course I did. Just as the day went.
Well after dinner I did the usual beauty treatment. Which mom just loved. the staff got her ready for bed. Wow. mom wanted to get to bed, like now. So I put her to bed and cleaned up and left.
Now it was extremely cold out, and all I have is summer clothing. I was wearing a tee shirt, a cotton sweater and a soft shell jacket, and I through on a pull over wind breaker. I was freezing cold. My hands froze. And with this cold. All my injuries were hurting me. Before I was carrying an extra 30 lbs. Not anymore. So I am feeling extremely cold and was all the way home. My knee was, which I had operated on years ago. Was killing me. And my thumb on my left hand, which I almost took off with a band saw. It has been hurting me for days now and I have been barely able to use it.
I just can't get warm and stay their. mom's place is hot, according to them, but I could not get warm. I guess I am going to have to go on a shop lifting trip to get some warm clothing and a jacket and gloves and a scarf and toque.
Of course I won't go and steal the clothing. I feel like it though. I need all of the above and more. Yet I have no way of getting them.
I need to continue to bring mom some good dinners.As tonight mom ate all of her dinner I brought. And mom barely eats anything of what they serve. This is a problem and I pray that I can keep bringing mom dinner. So she gets something good before she goes to bed. It is a long time before breakfast and it is imperative that mom eats dinner. This has been going on for weeks now. Mom not wanting her meal at night. I don't blame her. I see what they serve her. I try to make it taste better. I bring sauce, butter whatever I can bring for her. But I have nothing left to bring her.
So I have a huge problem. I need to keep warm to travel their and back. And most importantly, bring mom dinner at night. I don't know what I should do. I need advice and help.
It is a wonderful thing that I get to spend this time with my mother and for me to help her as I am doing.
But the worst part of this all now, is I need to move to White Rock, and I am now feeling very alone. Tonight I wish I had someone to come home too,. To be able to speak with and just being with. I never felt this way before.
Darn it, mom brought this all up and I was OK with being alone, but not anymore. I think I am going to check out the Mormon church. They seem to believe in family and being their for each other.
Man I am screwed up, this cold must be really getting to me.
GOD Bless and good night.
Kris
