Hello again
Well I have had this major headache for three days now. I am not sleeping. I tried again last night. I took extra sleep aids and all I did was just lie in bed, my mind racing, thinking of a service for my mother, my bills and everything else. I don't even want to finish unpacking, as I am afraid that when I do, I will not have a place to live. I am very worried about this. Especially now that Christmas is coming upon us. Everyone is busy. Resources are lousy and almost none existent.
I am not sure why this is happening and I feel that I am being punished by GOD. For, well, I just don't know. I did the right thing for years. I had to get over my mother's passing. And that is not happening. But I am better than before. Yet it still hurts allot.
I wasn't ready to be in the work force. I would of just fell apart on the job. Now I can deal with it,better.
I am not just applying for certain jobs. I am applying to as many jobs as I can. I just need to work and than I can look for something that can use my skills. But a job is all I need right now. I mean right now. I have to pay the rest of my rent and bills, plus next month.
Sleep is also what I need. I am feeling out of it now. Three days and maybe 6 hours of sleep, together. I am becoming delirious. A little bit anyways.
This headache is most likely part of it.
I ask to pray, maybe your prayers will help. Mine don't seem to be working. And I pray every night, I read the bible everyday. I talk to GOD all the time. And I talk to mom as much as I can. I believe she can hear me. After all she awaits a memorial service. But she is with Dad and her parents.
Starting to not think about much. I have major brain fog.
So please pray and if you can help with mom's memorial service, the address is below. It will be listed on the blog until I reach my goal. $2000. is what it will take. I checked it out at the funeral home where I would have it, so the others don't have an excuse not to come. Close to them. Along way from my home. But this is OK.
https://www.gofundme.com/krisschmuland
GOD bless and good night
Kris Schmuland
