Hello again
It is the end of the month and I am short on my rent . I hope the landlord accepts most of it and the rest in a few weeks, when I get paid from the new job I start next week. I still have to find another part time job..
But that is not it. I am and have been thinking about that last day, when mom passed away. Holding her hand, telling her it was OK if she had to go, that it was selfish of me to want her to stay. If it is time, mom, then please go on to GOD. This is so hard to even write this down without breaking down in tears, I am not over the loss of my mother. Not even close. It hurts so much still.
And the fact that my sister's did what they did. So mom does not even get a service. Cancel the, already arranged, service. And change it to somewhere else without even telling me. This hurts as well. I am suffering because of this. Mom's spirit has suffered even more. Mom has not had closure. Whether you believe in this or not. Our spirit needs this closure, the people that new my mother, need closure, to say what she meant to them. How she affected their lives. This is the most important part of a memorial service is to be there and speak. This mother needs and I need as well. I am sure that the others, who knew mom, need to be where we can gather and spread the love, that my mother is.
Please help out and give to this cause. I would like to be able to give mom this service on the anniversary of her passing January 31, 2017.
Please note I have not given an update in sometime. As I have been in no place in my life, to do so. But it is coming up to that 1 year anniversary.
I will try to give an update as soon as possible
It has been hard enough to just keep this blog going. But I keep tying, and will keep writing.
https://www.gofundme.com/krisschmuland
May GOD bless you
Goodnight
Kris Schmuland
