Hello again
I realize that the one thing missing from my life is peace quiet. To just be alone, to not be around anyone when I need to just be alone. And I cannot do this here. No peace. No alone time. Time where I can walk around naked if I so choose to do so.
I am extremely stressed out now and have been for a while. I have not been able to grieve. I cannot get someone to speak with, about all the junk going on in my life and all the issues that are affecting me. My depression, anxiety, self loathing, my OCD and PTSD plus a few other things that are going on. Borderline personality disorder. I want to go and hang out with people, but when I am with them, I don't want to be there. I need to leave and be by myself.
I can't stop thinking about how much I miss my mother. I still haven't called the police concerning the wheelchair. I still have not given my mother a service. I keep asking for your help, but nothing, So I ask again.
Help me put my mother to peace, by giving her a memorial service she deserves.
https://www.gofundme.com/ka556fdk
There are so many things that need to be done. I need a doctor to assist me with my disability application. Very hard to find.
I am more and more pain each and everyday. I want to quit. Just give up. My life is not going where I want it to go. My own self is stopping me. Not thinking I am worthy to have something nice, or live on my own.
I have to phone this place back and let them know I am the housing registry.
There is so much to write and I have no idea where to start or even what I am going to write about next.
I am drawing a blank today. Has been like this all day long.
I can't even write the truth at this moment. Being spied on.
Well that is it.
GOD bless and good night.
Kris Schmuland
