Hello again
Today I had to go back into Vancouver to the Microsoft store, as I took my laptop in yesterday to try to fix a problem with Microsoft's Silver light program. They couldn't download there own program, because of there firewall. Interesting.
So the tech guy was doing things to make my computer faster, and well it just messed it up and when I brought it home, it was so bad I couldn't even connect to the Internet. Brought it back and he fixed it for me. At the store you get 15 - 20 free service.
Fixed now.
Well after that I wondered around. I had nothing else to do. Now where to go. Just looked at different things and people.
Took some photo's of the northshore mountains. Put them up on FaceBook. Then I just found a place and read a bit.
I keep trying to look at my mother's photo's, but every time I do, I just start crying. I am not even dealing with it properly. I have been so busy dealing with the sister's and the Supreme Court action, that I can't even grieve.
Mom was my life and she was the only family I had left in this world. The other's try to tell me there my family,, but they are mere strangers to me. I haven't heard or seen anything from them in a dozen years. Strangers, that is all they are. And that is all they will ever be. The only reason they are even speaking to me is there is the inheritance. And they are calling to speed up the process.
I just don't give a crap about the money. I just want my mother back. Sure the little will help out a bit. But it won't give me my family back, my mother.
So I go on and struggle with life as it is. I just want a funeral service for mom. And you know I am trying to raise money for this. I would prefer a loan, with substantial interest to who ever will assist with me with this. It won't even have anything to do with me. It will just involve the probate lawyer. Writing a cheque directly to whomever it is that will assist me. Electronic money transfer. Whatever can be agreed upon.
So I wait some more.
I have put a deposit down on a service, I just need the rest. It has been to long. Mom should of had her service within two weeks of her passing. NOT TWO MONTHS OR MORE.
I would like it to be done in two weeks. I ask for your assistance. Please read the updates on the campaign page. This will explain everything.
Now there are photo's that each of the two sister's say they don't have. Photo's of mom and dad's wedding, dad's in the service. His medals. And I want copies of them all. But they continue to say they don't have them. Well someone has them and I know it is not me and I know they were at my younger sister's place the last time I saw them.
I think about all of this and I pray for GOD's assistance with this. It is only GOD that can help me out.
The one thing that really upsets me, is that there is no one for me to speak with. I have not been able to speak with anyone about my mother's passing and how I am feeling. No one even bothers to check up on me. I spent 4 1/2 years dealing with all the staff at Al Hogg and not a one of them has even called. Even the daughters of residents I know, have not bothered to call.
Maybe I am asking to much. I think not. I gave of myself to all. I was willing to help all who needed my help.
Another thing that bother's me is I knew all these residents and became friends with them. But being banned from Al Hogg, I can't visit them. I know some of them are even saying why isn't he coming to see us. I know this. I have only spoken with one resident and she is a lovely women.
Now I say I don't care what happens to me anymore. I just need a service for mom and then I just don't care.
It hasn't even been two months yet and I am suffering greatly. I don't even want to be around people anymore. I think why bother. It is not worth it.
This is the worst thing that has ever happened to me.
I say my mother deserves to have the respect she should have, by having a service. So all of us can say our proper good bye's.
It is what we all need, it is what mom needs.
I am noticing that I am all over the place tonight with my writing. So I will just stop now. I think I could go on and on, but no.
Is it me, am I that much of a horrible person that no one will speak with me.
GOD bless and good night
Kristopher Schmuland
