Hello again
So I am getting sick of everyone, OK, a few people stating I will be blessed. And today someone says to me, do you have to visit your mom everyday.
I don't have to do anything. Mom is alone, she needs some family around her everyday. Mom and dad raised me well and it is my turn to give back. As it should be.
I see all of the other residents and their lack of family visits. Come on now, It is your parents. Don't they deserve the best. And don't they deserve their children to be there for them. Of course they do.
Tonight Mary, mom, refused to eat. She was extremely tired and did not want anything. It is lucky I brought her a smoothie, with Vega one supplement in it. This is mostly what she consumed. Mary had a few bits of some of her dinner. I brought her a nice omelette and nothing. She was sound asleep when I arrived. At least I got at least an 8 oz glass of the smoothie into her.
After this she woke up and was wide awake. And talking a mile a minute. But I couldn't understand her. This is where I get pissed off at GOD. I asked that GOD help me to understand her. And yet nothing.
I am getting worried. As mom was saying that she is bored and not wanting to stay alive anymore. Nothing to live for . Being stuck in this place and not doing anything.
I was right on this, telling her that she needs to stay around. That she has lots to live for yet. We have allot to do yet. I was crying and mom was crying.
Mom is moving into another stage of her disease, Alzheimer's. This is not a very good sign.
I am freaking out right now. I don't know what to do. I need to be close to her. To do
I found a place two blocks away. An apartment. It is $740. per month and if I sign a one year lease, they will reduce the rent by $50.00 per month. So that is $690.00 per month. That is $100 more per month than I actually make.
I have bedroom furniture, but nothing else. It is OK, I can deal with that. As long as I am close to her.
I will completely loose it, if I get a call in the middle of the night telling me something happened to mom. I will never read the bible again, I would never speak that name again. As it is I am so made right now. Not at mom, but at the PGT for not keeping their word. Even thought they deign they ever said anything like that. That is the way they are.
I need serious help. I can live with no furniture. I have a bed and bedroom furniture. The place includes cable and heat. Yea basic cable, no problem.
I am just worried about mom. She is not happy and not eating. Nothing in this world can make me want anything else.
I don't care if I ever have a car again. I don't care if I ever date again. As long as I can be closer to mom and do more things for her and with her.
I really do need help. This place is very close and it is not a basement suite. So no one looking over your shoulder. As in the owners living upstairs.
If you can find it in your heart, please help.
I am going deaf you know.
GOD bless and good night
Kris Schmuland
