Hello again
The fact is, on top of everything I have wrong with me, I still have to go and get tested for Cancer. I am dealing with all my problems. But Cancer I can't deal with.
I am also a diabetic and I am to eat breakfast, lunch and dinner. Yes, in theory, I am to do this. but when you have nothing. I have nothing. The fridge and cupboards are empty, so eating is out of the question. Not good for my diabetes.
I thought GOD would help me out. I don't expect GOD to help out without me doing something towards the problem. As you have been reading, I am trying to get a job. I get excited that I have a job and then, you know what happened. Even though these things are happening. I am still looking for work.
Christmas was always a good time of the year for me. Especially since I was able to make mom's Christmas excellent. But this year, with everything that is happening, Once diagnosis after the other. I can truly say I hate Christmas. I HATE CHRISTMAS. I can't say it loud enough.
There is nothing magical about this time of the year for me anymore. To the point where I can say I HATE CHRISTMAS. There is nothing I can see to happen to make me change my mind. I am alone, I have nothing, I try and try to no avail.
My teeth are still very painful, getting a little better, but still not well enough to eat anything to make a difference. Or to enjoy.
My phone has not rang in days. Anyone who I would care to speak with anyways. Yes people looking to make money off of me, Scams etc .... Oh yea and someone who needs to know what I am going to do about the urgent matter at hand.
So my depression worsens. I can't sleep, to the point where I am exhausted. Now if I try to sleep now I won't be able to sleep. Like this morning. 6 am rolled around and I was still awake. So I didn't sleep. My mistake is I took a nap this afternoon, now I am wide awake.
As I have written I just can't deal with anything anymore.
GOD bless and good night
Kris Schmuland
I need help now I really do mean that. I can't wait
https://www.gofundme.com/anewmesmile
