Hello again
The last few days have been tiring. I have no idea why. It has been cold and wet, maybe that is why.
Mom has been OK, eating well and getting plenty of liquids. I brought her a nice sheet set and pillow cases. It goes great with the new pillows and sham. I have been staying latter, as I want to make sure mom is completely asleep and relaxed. I know when her hand is no longer gripping mine.
Mom falls asleep with a smile on her face. She looks so peaceful, it is great. When I get their mom has the huge smile on her face.
She has been telling me she is like a baby, having to feed her, whip her mouth and eye's. But I say, that I am here to look after you. And everything is OK. Mom loved this. This is what I want to do, and need to do. I believe and know this is my responsibility.
She is having trouble chewing certain foods, so I need to get a juicer for her. Mom needs more fresh vegetables in her diet. What they serve is not fresh and over cooked. A juicer would solve this problem. I am not going to replace her smoothies. That is different and separate. And I will always give mom her daily smoothie.
More people have been telling me that I will be blessed for doing what I am doing. I don't care about being blessed latter. It is now, I need the blessing. Not latter, because I won't be around after mom passes. I have nothing and no one. Mom is the only one I have in my life. I have no family or friends.
And all of the accidents I have been in have caused me to suffer from severe depression. I can't do any of the things I use to do. I am in pain all the time. And none of the doctors I see, seem to do anything about it. Which sucks!.
Well midnight and I need some sleep. Not getting much. I keep waking up every few hours.
GOD bless and good night
Kris Schmuland
