Hello again
It has been over a week and I still feel nauseous, I feel like crap. I have a headache. I don't feel like eating (it is a good thing, I have nothing) I am dizzy and I have not been sleeping much at all. At least I achieved 3 hours of sleep last night. Straight sleep, that is.
My OCD is kicking in and part of it is I don't like to be touched, and I need real order. No, when it comes to mom, none of my OCD applies. It is at this stage, where crooked pictures really bother me. And if I am on the bus and someone is sitting to close to me, I start to get anxious and start having a mild panic attack, which can turn into a larger one. And if this happens I have to get off the bus. Or I freak out on who ever is sitting besides me and touching me. If they don't respond to me asking them, politely, to move over.
And it was one of those days where I did not want to even speak with anyone. And everyone who walked by me, said hello to me. I mean everyone that I walked by on this one street on the way to mom's home.
Mom, looked very tired today. I can see the stress she is under by not getting enough sleep. Today is her roommates bath day, so after dinner, when I brought mom back to her room, it was very quit and peaceful. She just loved this. And it was this way for over half hour.
Then when the roommate came back, the lights went on and the TV went on. Not a peaceful moment with the roommate in the room. I did, however, manage to get mom into bed and most of her nightly spa treatment in before the roommate came back from her bath. This women can't go a minute with out the TV on.
I am stressing out about this as well.
I brought mom some chicken today and she didn't like it. I should of brought her sushi, which she told me she would of preferred. So tomorrow it will be sushi. And that will be it for dinners this week for mom. I don't have the funds to make her, or purchase her dinners this week.
I think I will just be able to get the fruit for her. I still have to get mom her coke as well. It will be tight. As well as fruit for her smoothies. I pray to GOD that HE helps me out with this. So mom has what she needs for the next week. As I could care less if I have anything. Really, I only care if mom has what she requires for the week.
I don't know what to do. Any body got any answers for me.
Midnight and I have to try to get some sleep tonight if I can. I am not sure, the stress I am feeling is not good. I have things online for sale, but they are not selling. I use to get some extra monies from my roommate, as he drinks allot, but the new roommate, who speaks no English, has been grabbing them. I try to explain that he leaves them for me. But they are not understanding anything I am saying. I try to tell them that this helps me out during the month when I have nothing. It helps me get the extra things for mom.
Anyways I will stop now.
GOD bless and good night.
