Hello again
I am worried about allot of things and very upset that I as the son can't do anything about it. More like extremely depressed. It is difficult for me at times and Ok at the same time. I hope you understand this. I cannot explain how this can be.
I am worried about mom not eating. She is being peckish, and just not eating. When I do bring food mom eats it all. But I am so disgusted with myself that I can't bring mom dinner every night. I would cook everyday before I leave just so mom has a fresh meal. I would have to get one of those bags that keep food hot.
I am worried about mom not walking and her not being able to walk anymore.
I am worried about the winter. It is so cold. And if it snows I can't get their. The buses probably wont run. And mom is going to be upset. This is why it is important for me to be in White Rock and why the PGT should do as it was mentioned to me. And told me that they would do. About $7000. is what I was told.
I am worried about being cold. I am freezing cold. I have never been this cold before. I get home and crank on the oil heater to high and it still does not help. My body is cold all the time. My hands, wow, They are like they were in the freezer. I need to have a warm and dry jacket. And some gloves. and scarf. This is going to be a difficult winter. And I need to be warm it is a long journey their and back.
It is also upsetting me when people tell me you that I am giving up so much I am not giving up anything. I didn't have a life before these 10 years. At least I have more of a life now. I am out doing something.
I still what someone to follow me for a day. I dare someone to do this. A reporter please, would be the best person. To see that I don't make this up. My mother gave up allot for me, and it should be returned.
And the bags that I carry are getting heavy and starting to dig into my shoulder. The only thing that is in the two bags that I carry are my wallet, my pain killers and a not book and some pens. Everything else is everything for mom and more and more is being added to them. They have to weight 20 lbs a piece. It was only ten minutes or so before, when mom was in Coquitlam. And now it is two and a half hours that I carry them.
This cold is killing me. My hip is bad, and my knee is like someone is jabbing me with I don't know what but all the parts of my body that were injured or broken when I was younger. Have become a source of extreme pain. Arthritis I guess.
Now I need so much I am begging GOD
Well it is time to go to bed. I am cold, hungry and depressed
GOD Bless and good night
Kris
The three hardest tasks in the world are neither physical feats nor intellectual achievements, but moral acts: 1) To return love for hate; 2) To include the excluded; and 3) To say 'I was wrong.'
~ Ernst Heinrich Haeckel
