Hello again
So today the 3 hour bus ride went well. To the point where I missed my stop in White Rock. Just by one stop. I was reading scientific research articles on Alzheimer's/Dementia, as well as my geek magazines.
Google Currents. Load whatever Magazines onto it and read away. It is great, updates automatically through WiFi
Anyways I arrived at the home and walked in. Now this was the best part of my day, even knowing I wouldn't be having dinner. I saw mom, but she saw me first and when I looked at her, she had this huge smile on her face and was reaching for me. Makes everything worth while.
I brought her spaghetti and meat sauce. Which I told her I would do. We went and got her plate out of her room. And while there I turned down the bed and moved it so I can get mom up on the lift and into bed. Went and warmed up the meal. She couldn't wait.
There was a big container full and I covered it with cheese. Mom finished it. Plus the chicken from her dinner and dessert. I couldn't afford a papaya today, Maybe tomorrow I will. I have to walk over to the return it centre and bring in the empties that my roommate left. Then I will have enough to get mom the papaya and maybe an avocado as well.
It is hard sometimes when mom is hungry and wanting everything. She reaches for everything, while I am trying to feed her. Mom's hand gets covered with everything as well. The only thing I can do is gently take her hand in mine and wipe off the sauce. Many times.
Mom was hungry and tired. She normally doesn't eat much on the weekend, but today was different. I guess she knew I was bringing spaghetti for dinner and ate, even though she was very tired.
I got her into bed, and gave her the nightly spa treatment. Even though I got a few punches in the head. She was tired and didn't want to be fussed with. It is all good.
I will never forget the look on her face when I walked in a saw her.
It was very cold out today, and again, no matter how many layers I have on, I am cold. My hands where freezing. Even though I had two pairs of gloves on. They are dollar store gloves. I don't even have any long sleeve shirts. Besides dress shirts. So I pile on Cotton sweaters. And I do have this down vest, but it is leaking feathers. I have no idea where from. But no sleeves. This is where I am getting my chill from.
I am tired of feeling guilty for what I do to help mom out. Looking after her. I am proud of the fact I do this. No matter what anyone says or thinks about it.
I am going to expect to receive help from other's/ all, as I do deserve it. The other members of this family don't give a damn and don't do anything for mom. But I continue to do so, and I will not stop. I do this as it is the right thing to do. Take care of your family. And mom is the only family I have.
I am following what is right and doing everything I can. Well not everything, I can do more. I just need to get out to where she is and save the 6 hours a day traveling.
Time to go to bed. Very tired and considering my roommate didn't let me use his van to bring in the empties, today. I will walk them over. It is alittle much to carry, but I will manage.
GOD bless and good night
Kris Schmuland
